A Parody Transmigration: Taking Danmei All the Way

I squeezed out the very last bit of air in my lungs. Satisfied, I watched the candle on the farthest cake light flicker twice, then... go out. I quickly opened my mouth wide, but before I could breathe in the air I'd missed so much, I saw the fragrant cake in front of me growing larger and larger. Its rich aroma filled my nose, and then I couldn't see anything at all... The sandalwood and rosewood filling the room, the silk, the silver-inlaid and gold-plated “antiques,” the “ancients” before me in long robes, and my body, unmistakably smaller and male (don't ask how I know)... At last, I confirmed the truth: I, a perfectly respectable woman in my twenties who loved boys' love fanfiction, had transmigrated too, and was immensely honored to become part of the trend! Actually, if, if Heaven could give me one more chance, I'd ask: Why couldn't I have eaten the cake first? Waaaaah, my twenty-four-inch fruit cake... This was truly a tragedy to sing about, and I regretted it so much my guts turned green! The very next moment, my stomach started sticking up for its poor gutsy brother, rumbling loudly. Theme: