Why Are My Beloved Ministers Stammering?

Next up: The Foolish Beauty Plays the Most Hated Person. Blurb below. 50% anti-theft ratio. In the fourth year of Jinghe, Regent Sima Xiao held power over the court and had a notoriously mercurial temperament. He abducted the top-ranked scholar in broad daylight, and the emperor issued an edict arranging their marriage. The scholar would rather die than submit. On the wedding day, Ning An transmigrated into the story, ready to climb onto the treacherous minister's face and give him a piece of his mind. He had barely begun when Sima Xiao came back, carrying three pixelated heads in his hands. He had just finished killing someone. Ning An dropped to his knees with a thud, bowing at a perfect 90-degree angle. "Sumimasen, Prince-sama! Watashi didn't mean it!" The original character had already gone completely off the rails. To stay alive under the hand of this living god of death, Ning An put on a little show at the prince's residence every single day. He also discovered that he was bound to a gossip system, with all the juicy little secrets of every civil and military official at his fingertips. At court one day, Sima Xiao sat beside the emperor, stirring up trouble as usual, while Ning An daydreamed nearby (and gossiped to himself). Sima Xiao suddenly stood up and bumped into Ning An, instantly activating the DNA of a man who lived for putting on a show. In front of the entire court, Ning An spun around and fell, biting his lower lip. "My prince, it hurts. Blow on it for me." Inside, he cheered: "Oh my god, the Vice Minister of Justice was almost drained dry last night! What a wild time. The Minister of Revenue slept hugging his dog again yesterday, and Prince Jing is taking the day off? Oh, right, he was playing bondage with his secondary consort yesterday, pulled something down there, and can't get out of bed. I want to see! I love this! Could I say my leg's broken and get off work early?" Sima Xiao's eye twitched. "My wife's talent for faking an injury keeps getting better." The whole court wore twisted expressions. We want to get off work early too! We want to hear the gossip too! The newly named top scholar, Ning An, had his future ruined when he married into the Regent's household, and the Regent shoved him into the secret police bureau, the Northern Pacification Office. Every day at court, he served up gossip right to people's faces: "Grand Secretary Zhang, you're over fifty and still taking aphrodisiacs? Aren't you worried you'll die in bed? Grand Secretary Yan got kicked out by his wife again. Women are like wolves and tigers at forty. Why don't you borrow a couple of pills from Grand Secretary Zhang? And then there's Lord Xu..." Every civil and military official could hear Ning An's thoughts. They all looked at one another, their toes curling with embarrassment. On the outside, Ning An was the picture of serene elegance. Inside: The young emperor's no good either. Sima Xiao scared him into wetting himself just now, and he hasn't even changed his pants. He's naked underneath. The officials' faces turned red and green. They all assumed Ning An knew so many secrets because he was the commander of the Northern Pacification Office. The officials: Ning An is terrifying! But Sima Xiao was the highest commander of the Northern Pacification Office. The officials all sucked in a breath. The officials: The Regent is terrifying! Only Sima Xiao knew that his subordinates' gossip couldn't compare to Ning An's. Sima Xiao lowered his eyes with a faint smile. He hadn't just gotten the gossip, he'd gotten the man too. A goofy, sweet story The courtier mind-reading trope has been done to death on Tomato, and there are even short dramas about it. A brainless wish-fulfillment story. One-on-one romance. Please don't offer writing advice. Thanks. The Foolish Beauty Plays the Most Hated Person Ji Yu transmigrated into a story about a real and fake young master, as the real young master whom everyone hated. The real young master, hated by all, had a pretty face but was actually shallow, stupid, and cruel. Jealous of the fake young master, a beloved darling who had been born to shine, he did every bad thing imaginable. Ji Yu: I get it. I'm on the redemption arc for the most hated character. System: Wrong. You're playing the most hated character, so follow the plot properly. The first plot point: Use your status to humiliate the protagonist's boyfriend. Ji Yu swirled the red wine in his glass and tossed the boyfriend a million yuan, sneering, "I'm the real young master of the Ji family. Being with me is a better deal than being with Ji Yijing, right?" System: Host, those cufflinks on your boyfriend look like they're worth two million. Ji Yu: Isn't he supposed to be broke right now?! The second plot point: Pretend to be the protagonist and catfish someone online to ruin the protagonist's reputation. Ji Yu put on the protagonist's watch, drew a red birthmark like the protagonist's on his inner thigh, and, fighting his embarrassment, put on a maid outfit and a miniskirt. Then he sent a photo to the antagonist. "Big brother, do I look pretty?" The plan was to make the antagonist think the protagonist was seducing him, so the antagonist would start pestering the protagonist. Then Ji Yu would delete the antagonist, making him go berserk and take revenge on the protagonist. But after Ji Yu deleted the antagonist, it was Ji Yu who got cornered against a wall by the big shot backing him. The big shot grabbed Ji Yu by the waist and licked his lower lip, his voice low, hoarse, and full of dangerous aggression. "You're not calling me big brother anymore?" Ji Yu frantically called out to the System: Wasn't that the antagonist's WeChat account?! System: ...I have no idea. To play a clever, scheming, green-tea character hated by everyone, you'd need to be smart. Ji Yu had never been particularly bright, so all he could do was put in more effort. If he couldn't act weak, he'd make the wound a little deeper, then cry. If he couldn't frame someone, he'd make himself look a little more miserable, then cry. But every time, Lu Jingyao would find him, scoop him up, and comfort him. He comforted Ji Yu so well that Ji Yu felt too embarrassed to keep crying. Reading guide: * Please don't offer writing advice. * The protagonist is a foolish beauty who thinks he's being wicked. He's one-track-minded, but not stupid. * Blurb dated 2025.2.18. Message: Bring peace to all generations.