Read before you start: A few warnings:
1. The female lead is an original character, not the Warrior of Light. The main pairings are the female lead x Zephirin and the female lead x Paul Verlain (pure romance, proceed with caution). Other pairings include Zephirin x Haurchefant (not romantic), Haurchefant x the Warrior of Light, and more.
2. Since this isn't set in the original world, things may depart from the original canon. Canon divergence is to be expected.
3. The villainous female lead is a true antagonist. The original villain, the pope, has an absolutely terrible time, and the good guy Aymeric has an even worse time. But Haurchefant and the Heavens' Ward make out like bandits, lounging around and getting carried to victory.
4. Without Thordan's influence, Zephirin really would be a good guy, and he doesn't hold a grudge against Haurchefant. Proceed with caution if you can't accept this.
5. Game fanfiction can run into canon accuracy issues, so there will be additional original details. Also, the Ishgardian meaning of the word "knight" is not the same as the game's "Knight" job. Consider yourself warned, and don't nitpick.
Here's the blurb:
An Ishgardian gossip magazine interviewed the first female pope. What follows is the jaw-dropping interview that they ultimately decided not to publish.
Q: We heard that you and Lord Haurchefant were childhood friends. Why didn't you and...
A: I ship Haurchefant and the Warrior of Light. Haurchefant isn't my ex-boyfriend, thanks. I don't want his ship fans to come after me.
Q: We've heard that you and Lord Aymeric don't get along...
A: I admire Aymerich.
Q: I was actually asking about Aymeric...
A: I said I admire Aymerich.
Q: There's a rumor going around that you're two-timing...
A: I want them all.
Theme: A good man is someone you tame yourself
Zephiran, you... Can perfectly reason and arrive at the wrong answer...! But it doesn't matter, I still got it in the end. Hehe, the innocent boy will definitely be eaten to death by the female gangster.
The Tibetan Fox was so disgusted hahahaha
Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh on me and the text is already so funny, I just spit out the words when I saw Zuo
They're all the Pope (that tone) It's normal to have a few more, the Cangqi are all the Pope's dogs (what)
Okay, it's time to order some red beans and rice for Zephiran. You kid, sit in the wife's seat for me (hey)
I agree! (It's so beautiful and the author is so good at writing, I'm hooked)
The rice is fragrant, when will we start to reconcile love and the sky? I want to watch the beauty
Nice(//?//)
The Warrior of Light makes his grand appearance!
Ah, great, may there never be another copy of the Papal Chamber. Amen