[Mythology] Being a Great Shaman Is Hard, and the True Lord Sighs

In the Shang Dynasty, just after coming down from Shu Mountain, Jin Xueliu worked hard and climbed her way up to become the great witch of her tribe. She had been planning to use her paper-making skills to quietly amaze everyone.

Then her godmother casually conjured a water ball, leaving her utterly stunned.

Well, why bother farming when cultivating immortality is so much better? Especially when she immediately takes on a little brother who works like a demon and comes with a farming-and-pig-raising buff. Suddenly, she has something to look forward to: eating and drinking to her heart's content.

Until one day, her little brother suddenly brings home a handsome, down-on-his-luck man and obediently hands him over to her.

Jin Xueliu looks him up and down. Hmm, apart from being handsome, he's utterly ordinary.

Luckily, this handsome man has a natural gift for attracting cats and dogs. Today he rescues a dog, tomorrow he cuddles a cat, giving her the life of someone who has both cats and dogs.

She also happens to pick up a haughty little snowman who claims to be an "ancient divine artifact." It spends all day either egging her on to "pull off something big" or mocking her for being "too weak at cultivation."

She never expected that bringing along a vain mountain god and following the snowman's wild schemes would accidentally uncover a fragment of ancient secrets, turning her into the Three Realms' number-one spectator.

One day, she suddenly discovers that the seemingly ordinary handsome man is actually Heaven's most wanted fugitive, the future Judicial God, True Lord Qingyuan Miaodao, Yang Jian, also known as Erlang Shen...

And she actually had the nerve to toy with him and then abandon him?

Jin Xueliu: Forget it, there's no time to explain. I'd better run!

Yang Jian smiles and blocks her with his fan. "Didn't we agree to be together for lifetimes to come? Trying to welch now?"

Dealing with Yang Jian is already difficult enough, but Jin Xueliu not only refuses to mend her ways, she gets even more outrageous, shouting at everyone everywhere:

Shao Siming, stop overworking yourself. There's not enough KPI on my side for you to squeeze out!

Queen Mother of the West, if you need something, ask Qiongqi. If not, don't come looking for me.

Zhao Gongming, we can talk about whatever you want, but pay up first.

Hou Yi, stop chasing me so relentlessly. So I took your weapon, what's the big deal?

Ancestral Dragon, what's the matter? I only drank some of your little one's blood. It's not like it lost a chunk of flesh.

Jade Emperor, why am I at the top of the wanted list now? And you're calling me a god of calamity? Can't take a joke?

And Canglong, did I offend you? Why are you joining in?

One day, the Jade Emperor finally can't take it anymore and secretly finds his nephew. "Judicial God, go deal with her."

Yang Jian looks up and sighs softly. "Thanks for the offer. I obey orders, but not summons."

CP: Jin Xueliu x Yang Jian

A ferocious god who looks righteous but stirs up trouble x a gentle, cool-headed Judicial God

Reader's Guide:

My take on mythology: The highest authority is Heaven. The Heavenly Court first follows the Three Sovereigns and Five Emperors system, then Dijun becomes the Heavenly Emperor, and after that the Jade Emperor becomes Haotian. The Jade Emperor plays different factions against each other, while Buddhism and Daoism have yet to grow powerful. Since Chinese mythology has no high-caliber villains, some major figures will make guest appearances as villains, so please don't take it too seriously. As this story draws on mythology, its place names don't correspond to real-world locations.

Main references: Investiture of the Gods, Journey to the West, The Lotus Lantern and its prequel, Classic of Mountains and Seas, and Buddhist and Daoist mythology.

Revised 2025.9.16

Theme: Love is an embrace amid landslides and tidal waves