How to Let Qin Shi Huang Die of Old Age

Updated according to the rankings recently (fist bump)! Coming soon: For the blurb of Dynasties: Divine Beasts Really Don't Speak Human, see below. For others, check the announcements. [Ding! A request from the Great Qin Empire has arrived. Please accept: Let Qin Shi Huang die of natural causes.] She transmigrated into the past and immediately heard the people around her shouting in grief: "Though Chu has but three households, Chu will be the one to destroy Qin!" Zhi Wei, swept along with the crowd and babbling incoherently: "???" So... With a grave expression, Zhi Wei said: "Does the real meaning of 'let Qin Shi Huang die of natural causes' happen to be..." The System was horrified: "No, no, no, no! Stop thinking!" = Later generations have come up with all kinds of theories about Qin Shi Huang's health. After seeing the hard-working, construction-loving emperor with her own eyes, Zhi Wei had this to say: If he keeps exhausting himself like this, who else is going to get sick if not him?! Ensuring that he [dies of natural causes] takes more than simply stopping him from taking elixirs. And so... Zhi Wei started growing Chinese yams and taro. "They're both [medicinal plants]. Their high yields are only a minor benefit." The ministers fell silent. The ministers were bewildered. The ministers chimed in: "That's right. She's correct." Zhao Gao exclaimed: "Where's the courage to speak frankly, my fellow ministers?" Zhi Wei treated a sheep's illness. People of the grasslands: "Divine Doctor, please take a look at us, too!" Zhi Wei hesitated: "But there's no point asking me." Just then, the First Emperor, cool as a cucumber, happened to pass by. Zhi Wei immediately pointed discreetly, closed her eyes, and waved her hands. Yes, this is not something we can speak of. Not something we can speak of. People of the grasslands: "We understand, we understand!" = After unification, anti-Qin forces emerged all over the country. Rumor had it that the daughter of King Zhou was blessed by Heaven, able to increase crop yields, bring the dead back to life, and turn evil into good. She was their spiritual leader! Zhi Wei, blessed by Heaven: "??? You can't just claim me like that!" = Discourses of the States, Book of Jin, Volume Eight: "Wenzi asked, 'Can medicine cure a state?' The answer was, 'The superior physician cures the state; the next best treats illnesses. That is the duty of medical officials.'" [Reader's Guide] 1. About the setting Please treat this as a parallel timeline, not real history. It includes creative adaptations and changes to the timeline. References are detailed in the author's notes after the first chapter; fictional elements aren't intended as historically accurate. Some words and expressions have been adjusted and don't fully match the period. Idioms and allusions aren't limited to a particular era. I'll try to make things reasonable and fair, but the story mainly serves the plot. Any inconsistencies are probably because the author's logic got tangled... 2. About the protagonist She has a golden finger, but she isn't a powerful female lead. The protagonist isn't a moral doctor (this is apparent in the early chapters, so please don't forget it later on). Romance is a very small part of the story. The heroine has no love interest, but after coming of age, she can't avoid people bringing it up, whether for political or social reasons. Even unrequited feelings still count as romance. 3. About updates Updates are posted in the evening. During the day, I'll edit, revise, and add author's notes. The notes are mainly for background information, citations, and creative adaptations, and I'll keep adding anything I've missed. Daily updates, though I'll take a day off if something comes up or I get stuck. I'm intermittently busy in real life and can't build up a backlog, so there may be bursts of frequent updates followed by slower periods. 4. About the comment section Objective, accurate educational information is welcome. For example, if the story or author's notes mention that the timeline for the King of Qin's arrival at Fankou has been changed, readers familiar with the original historical record can share more information with everyone. No long essays, personal attacks, subjective warnings, or fan and hater arguments. Feel free to argue about Zhao Gao and the Second Emperor, though. Please support the official version! Screenshot: 2022.12.28 Revised: 2023.8.22 Coming Soon: Dynasties: Divine Beasts Really Don't Speak Human In another world, there is a spirit clan whose members inherit memories from birth. However, they can only truly take human form after being tested by the long river of history. Following her elders' instructions, Qi Qi takes on the forms of different divine beasts throughout the dynasties, using their auspicious reputations to protect herself. The memories she's inherited, however, are rather "jumbled." [Qin] The ministers gathered around to stare at the divine beast before them. It had a single horn on its head, was about the size of a lamb, and looked somewhat like a qilin. "Is this a Xiezhi?" "It's so small! It doesn't look the way I imagined." "Ah! It knocked over the Director of the Imperial Household!" "Oh, no! You can't bite him!" Meng Yi gave it a strange look, then said to the silent ruler watching from the side: "Your Majesty, I've heard that the Xiezhi knows when someone is guilty and can tell right from wrong. When it finds a traitor, it knocks him down with its horn and eats him..." Ying Zheng looked thoughtful as he picked up Qi the Xiezhi. "How long will our Great Qin endure? Will our golden age last forever?" "Umm, Your Majesty, it'd be quicker if you just dreamed about it." "!" Fusu: "There hasn't been an eternal dynasty from ancient times through the Zhou. It isn't impossible for Great Qin to last a few hundred years..." Qi Qi: "That's got nothing to do with the Crown Prince who'll take his own life!" "Forced to" take his own life, Fusu: "...?" [Han] A divine bird had arrived, and Liu Che happily picked out some tasty fruit, preparing to feed Qi the Azure Bird himself. According to legend, the Azure Bird was the Queen Mother of the West's messenger. He wondered if it might be able to help him obtain an elixir of immortality someday. Qi Qi turned to Wei Qing and Huo Qubing and complained: "There is no Queen Mother of the West, but there is a map of the Western Regions. It's huge, even bigger than His Majesty's face." Huo Qubing: "Pfft!" Wei Qing: "Ahem, ahem, ahem!" Liu Che: "…" [Tang] Looking at the auspicious beast with a tiger's head sleeping on the imperial desk, Wei Zheng spoke to the emperor more gently than usual: "According to legend, the Bai Ze can speak and understands the nature of all things. It warns the people to ward off disasters, and appears when a virtuous ruler's benevolence reaches far and wide." After the Xuanwu Gate Incident, Li Shimin, who had been anxious about whether he could be a good emperor, finally felt relieved. His trusted ministers also reassured him: "The Bai Ze's appearance proves Your Majesty has the virtue of a true ruler. You needn't..." "The Turkic khagan is coming." The ruler and his ministers: "?!" They all turned to look at the imperial desk. Qi the Bai Ze mumbled in her sleep: "Mmm... later there'll also be... rebellions... locust plagues... droughts..." "!!!" Wei Zheng nearly shouted: "Your Majesty absolutely cannot let this make you neglect the government!" Li Shimin hurriedly said: "I won't!" Excerpt from coming soon: History Livestream: Where Should I Make a Wish Today? Leng Nuan is a laid-back travel vlogger. Whenever she visits a famous landmark or cultural relic, she livestreams a tour and talks to herself as she makes wishes, whether or not the "hosts" can grant them. What she doesn't know is that the livestream has already undergone a strange transformation. [Huo Qubing's Tomb] Leng Nuan: "Champion Marquis, I'd like to drive around Xinjiang this year. Please keep me safe on my trip!" Huo Qubing: "?" [Zhaoling Mausoleum] Leng Nuan: "I got hurt today, and I'm upset. I hope Emperor Taizong will appear and help catch the robber!" Emperor Taizong: "?" [Yonghe Temple] Leng Nuan: "This young woman's ID number is xxxx, and her home address is xxxx. My wish is... (Please don't assign me to a different school.) Also, please bless the cultural relics from the Old Summer Palace and help them return home safely!" Yongzheng: "?" Moral: The generous gifts bestowed by history will ultimately benefit the people.