Even a Goose Wants to Eat Swan Meat

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Blurb: Gaga is a strong and mighty Northeastern Chinese goose, famous throughout the village as a bully.

He's not only proud and domineering, but also a devoted goose with an eye for beauty, determined to find a gorgeous partner who's just right for him.

One day, while making his usual rounds at the village entrance, he spots an abandoned box. It seems to be moving.

Gaga (flapping his wings): Ah! My destined partner!

Ivan (eyes wide with shock): What is that ugly thing? Get away from me!

Ivan flaps his wings to escape, but a sharp pain shoots through one of them, and he lets out a couple of honks.

Gaga stretches out his neck. "Honey, are you hurt?!"

Ivan: ...I'm male.

Ivan repeatedly insists that he's a male swan and can't lay eggs, but Gaga is convinced that Ivan is the goose fate has chosen for him.

Gaga invites his "pretty wife" to eat feed. Ivan: Thanks, but no thanks. I'm a noble swan. I don't eat shit.

Gaga wants to treat Ivan's wound. Ivan: Can you ugly thing please stay away from me?

Gaga checks himself out in the mirror. What's wrong with that? I'm the most handsome goose for miles around.

Ivan tilts his head up proudly. "Do you know the difference between a goose and a swan?"

Gaga nudges the little fish in front of him closer. "What's the difference?"

Ivan eyes the fish. "Never mind. I'll tell you after I've eaten."

★ Coming soon: The Immortal Venerable's Little Chubby Bird Flew Away, a win-her-back-after-losing-her story

The aloof Immortal Venerable Qi Xiuyun of Qinglan Mountain returns from his travels with a sweet and pretty disciple. Everyone is baffled that the usually distant immortal is so patient with him, letting him get away with causing trouble, taking his side when he fights, and even personally cooking special meals to help him build up his strength.

What? It makes no sense.

Later, they figure it out. This isn't a disciple at all, it's a pet! A colorful, chubby little bird! And it's so soft and fun to pet!

Su Yuan: "Why are you so nice to me?"

Qi Xiuyun looks at him with glassy eyes. "Because I love you."

The tuft of hair on Su Yuan's head wobbles as he shyly lowers his head.

*

Later, rumors spread that the Immortal Venerable of Qinglan nearly killed the young demon lord in the Bottomless Abyss. From then on, the immortal and demon realms are sworn enemies.

Immortal Lord Qinglan endures eighty-one tortures, crosses the Spring of Crimson Flames, and descends into the Bottomless Ravine before finally seeing the person he has longed for day and night.

He staggers forward, grief-stricken. "...I was wrong. I failed you."

Su Yuan smiles innocently. "Who are you?"

Qi Xiuyun freezes. He doesn't remember him?

Trembling, he takes out a phoenix feather. "A Yuan, do you remember this? You gave it to me as a token of your love."

Su Yuan frowns and snatches it away. "This is my beautiful feather. I was going to give it to my partner!"

The two of them return to the peach tree where they first met. Qi Xiuyun remembers the fiery red figure lounging lazily in its branches, and his eyes grow wet. "A Yuan, do you remember this place?"

Su Yuan shakes his head. "I don't remember, but seeing this tree makes my heart ache."

Theme: Cherish nature