Big Brother Lies, but Big Brother Loves You

[The new novel next door, After the White Moonlight Faked His Death, is now underway! Retirement-minded slacker x aloof top disciple. Please add it to your favorites =3=]

Feng Nange had been the family’s pride and joy for four hundred and ninety-nine years. Her first act of rebellion came at five hundred, when she ran back to her mortal hometown, Mount Sanqing, alone, to undergo the phoenix’s rebirth.

A phoenix is reborn from the flames. She never expected that the first thing she’d see when she opened her eyes would be a handsome stranger wearing a kingfisher-feather headdress, sitting beside her bed.

Feng Nange: Someone, catch this pervert!

When he saw her slowly wake, the man smiled, his eyes full of affection.

“I’m the kingfisher you carved and imbued with spirit all those years ago. To repay you for giving me life, I’ve come to offer myself to you.”

Feng Nange: ?

Feng Nange: I was the one who imbued you with spirit. Do you think I don’t know that it can’t turn you into a person?

His lie was exposed in an instant, but the man wasn’t flustered. His eyes shimmered as he said:

“I’m the mountain god of Mount Sanqing. When your ancestor attained the Dao, even his chickens and dogs ascended with him. I cultivated alongside them and became a half-immortal. Now that you’ve returned to be reborn, of course I must protect you.”

Feng Nange: ?

Feng Nange: I’m a civil servant in the Immortal Realm, for heaven’s sake. You think I don’t have a list of every half-immortal?

-

Yan Xihe had spent half his life chasing pleasure, wandering between the Three Realms, telling more lies and loving more people than anyone.

His treasured instrument, the ancient zither Fuzhou, could play ethereal melodies that transcended the world and rousing tunes that stirred the mortal realm. Any sound Yan Xihe had recorded could be recreated by the zither, ready to use whenever he pleased.

The sound of a phoenix reborn was something one might hear only once in a thousand years. Just as he was enjoying recording it

The little phoenix woke up.

The little phoenix had a life so transparent and uneventful that a few flirtatious words were enough to make her, a girl who had never known love, willingly offer him every sound she could make.

Stealing sounds came at a price. Though he looked radiant on the outside, he had long since rotted to the bone within.

The evidence was the increasingly obvious mark of a vengeful ghost on his body.

As the little phoenix came dancing toward him, Yan Xihe’s eyes filled more and more with affection.

But deep inside, he grew colder and colder.

-

On the fifteenth day of the seventh month, the gates of the underworld swung wide open.

Yan Xihe had finally used the sounds the little phoenix had given him to compose a song of tribute. The vengeful ghosts of Mount Sanqing, their claws bared, caught his scent and came for his life.

The little phoenix, righteous and fearless, used her innocent heart to send the ghosts into the cycle of reincarnation.

She cut away his flesh and scraped his bones, freeing him from the shackles that bound him, and stayed by his side as he shed his past.

Then three thousand phoenix clan Immortal Venerables descended from the heavens. The little phoenix packed her things and politely said goodbye.

-

The ancient zither Fuzhou had recorded a hundred kinds of sounds and a thousand melodies. It was priceless, worth more than gold.

But since phoenixes only roost in parasol trees, Yan Xihe smashed the zither with one blow and used it as a step for the cave dwelling he had prepared for the little phoenix.

All so she might look at him one more time.

“If I’d known I would meet you, I would have learned how to love someone first.”

CP: Feng Nange x Yan Xihe

One-on-one, happy ending. Upright, aloof Immortal Realm civil servant x half-immortal musician, charming and full of lies.

Theme: Of three thousand waters, drink from just one.