The Gods Always Want to Date Me

01 Lance is the son of a monster, an ill omen. Every Divine Academy shut its doors to him. Only the Academy of the Key of Light gave him a chance. On the day of the opening ceremony, the statue of a god suddenly blazed with light, which descended upon Lance. The Seer clutched his blood-soaked eyes and cried hoarsely, "Blasphemy!" It seemed to confirm once again that Lance was an ill omen. When everyone from the academies rejected and despised him, only the Holy Son, Silas, cast aside all opposition and let the Academy of Light accept him. He was righteous, orderly, and gentle, the very definition of perfection. His golden hair was like light falling upon his crown, and his eyes were as deep blue as the sea, like countless stars. He was flawless, and as always, he wore a gentle, upright smile. To Lance, he was like a final salvation. 02 After entering the academy, on the sixteenth day of every month, when the moon was at its fullest, Lance was always "awake." The Otherkin Luo who stayed by his side would disappear, once again confirming that danger was approaching, and Lance would fall into a "dream." He gripped a rusted weapon, coated with the thing best suited to cursing the gods, and waited in fear. At three in the morning, the heavy bell began to toll. Dong, dong, dong... "Hee hee, where is cute little Lance?" An ancient presence. An immortal apparition. As on every night of the full moon, a blasphemous being... had descended. For Lance, it meant that his monthly escape had begun once more. One day, Lance stumbled into the sacred chapel, and a familiar figure filled him with both surprise and joy. He opened his mouth to call out. The man standing before the statue turned around, speaking in that same gentle, upright tone. Silas said, "Lance, why are you running away?" Lance realized in horror that beneath that calm, smiling voice bubbled strange, sticky murmurs. 03 After leaving the Academy of the Key of Light, Lance tried to find a way to escape from it. But no matter where he fled, he could never evade its gaze. Only after he reunited with his childhood friend Floral did Lance enjoy a period of peace. But the longer those days went on, the more pronounced his strange unease became, as if something were constantly reminding him that the danger was still there. Until one day, Lance opened the door to the room Floral had forbidden him to enter. Behind the door was a stretch of dark, heavy soil, planted with Otherkin of all sizes. In a blossom as large as a washbasin, a familiar yet unfamiliar face grew in a most uncanny way. Lance backed away, only to bump into a broad chest. He slowly turned his head and saw the same familiar yet unfamiliar smile on Floral's face. He asked, "Lance, why are you afraid?" Don't you love Silas the most? * Lance: Want to fall in love? The kind where you either go mad or die. Was he the one blaspheming against the gods, or were the gods blaspheming against him with filthy, mad desire? [Before You Read] 1. Expect all kinds of elements: coercive love, taking someone by force, nonhumans, Lovecraftian horror, and old-school academy settings. 2. The love interest's appearance is something he can change at any time. Anything can serve as a vessel. 3. The author's tastes have few limits, but I promise the couple gets a happy ending. If the rest isn't to your liking, please don't force yourself to read it. (bows) Coming soon: I Really Don't Want to Act. Please add it to your favorites! Aman thought he must be incredibly unlucky to have run into a mad dog while carrying out a mission. That day, he was merely lying low at Anfensi Temple, trembling as he disguised himself as a woman. Who could have guessed that after stepping out to deliver water, he would catch the eye of Shao Sijun, who happened to have stopped outside Anfensi Temple to rest? ...His current character setting was that of an unlucky woman sent away to recuperate by her philandering husband! But who cared? At least Shao Sijun didn't. That very night, Shao Sijun seized him and brought him to his residence. Well, that's it. He's done for. It was a prince's mansion. "System, do you think I could make him lose his memory again?" Aman shut his eyes in anguish, not wanting to face the mess before him. "I don't want to do this anymore." * The first time Aman found Shao Sijun, he treated him like a treasure and cared for him. But good times didn't last. Aman was a death-sworn guard, bound by forces beyond his control. After Shao Sijun lost his memory due to an injury, Aman sent him somewhere safe and quietly left. Someone like him was never qualified to keep anything precious. Then, just a few days later, something claiming to be a System fell from the sky and told him that if he helped it complete its missions, it could free him from his life as a death-sworn guard. After much thought, Aman went for it! One job was work, and two jobs were work too. Of course, he regretted that decision countless times in the dead of night, because that lousy System was completely unreliable! But what he hadn't expected was that he would meet Shao Sijun again. Only then did he realize that the Shao Sijun he'd known at first might not have been what he imagined at all. That had merely been a false disguise, like... a mad dog wearing a human skin. The one thing he could be grateful for was that this Shao Sijun was still the amnesiac Shao Sijun. Yet that was also the problem. The real Shao Sijun was flamboyant and bloodthirsty. If Aman revealed his identity, he probably wouldn't survive more than a few days. Aman: I'll make sure to hide my identity. Aman, a moment later: Help! I don't want to act out a story about a cheating mistress stealing someone else's husband! [The title and blurb may be revised. Thank you.] Theme: Face difficulties with a positive attitude, and save yourself from danger amid one perilous situation after another!