Whoever Falls First Is a Dog

Advance Preview: NPC Wants to Eat Me [Infinite], please add it to your reading list~~

A friend’s novel recommendation, no CP: Global Doomsday Cheat Device, please add it to your reading list~~

Blurb

When Bian Yu had just moved to Yulan Garden with his parents, he and Su Minyuan got along pretty well. Both their parents were busy, so you could say Su Minyuan practically raised Bian Yu.

Su Minyuan was six years older than Bian Yu. Bian Yu would lean on the fence and watch Su Minyuan see off yet another boyfriend, then say, “Bro, you’re such a player.”

Su Minyuan would ruffle Bian Yu’s hair. “So when you look for someone someday, keep your eyes open. Whatever you do, don’t find someone like me.”

Bian Yu did avoid finding someone like him. He went and became just like him instead.

A few years later, the once well-behaved boy had changed completely. He and Su Minyuan both topped the GAY community’s list of dream lovers.

Their styles were completely different. Su Minyuan’s gentleness made people overlook all the tears he had left in his wake, while Bian Yu was a bona fide beast who ruled the GAY community with his wild nature.

Yet even as he did whatever he pleased, he also stirred up some people’s desire to tame him.

One outrageous party, a spiked drink, and a man curled up on the bed.

With red eyes and gritted teeth, Bian Yu said to Su Minyuan, “I’ll sleep with you, but you have to be mine.”

Su Minyuan brushed the damp hair from his forehead. “The little puppy’s all grown up and has a dream now. That’s a good thing.”

*

Nobody in the world knew that Bian Yu had a crush on Su Minyuan. He tried to imitate Su Minyuan, thinking he could fade the image burned into his heart. But it took one night of reckless passion for him to realize he had been lying to himself all along. Every person he had dated before had carried some trace of Su Minyuan.

Bian Yu was an old hand at lying. He gathered up his sincerity and put on an air of indifference, thinking that night had been a fluke and everything would go back to how it was before.

But Su Minyuan’s unexpected tenderness slowly chipped away at Bian Yu’s already fragile defenses. Just as Bian Yu’s heart began to crumble, Su Minyuan said, “I thought we understood each other without having to say it.”

*

Su Minyuan knew that someday he would get what was coming to him, but he never expected the reckoning to come from the boy he had raised.

Someone told him, “Bian Yu is a complete and utter lunatic. He doesn’t even love himself, but he’s gone crazy over you. Do you know that? You don’t know a damn thing!”

Su Minyuan really didn’t know.

No.

He was only pretending not to know.

In the empty house, on the familiar sofa, Su Minyuan seemed to hear Bian Yu’s old words again:

“Whoever falls first is a dog!”

Bian Yu (bottom) X Su Minyuan (top)

Reader’s Guide:

1. Older top.

2. They both have exes. They’re both seasoned players.

3. The top will have to win the bottom back.

4. Please don’t curse me!!

Advance Preview: NPC Wants to Eat Me [Infinite]

Do you believe in Hell?

Shen Wu somehow ended up in a strange place with a group of strange people, playing a tired old role-playing game. One moment, his companions were talking; the next, they had become a meal on someone’s plate.

Death became commonplace. The sound of monsters chewing became a nightmare that followed them like a shadow, and the ways those people died reflected the Eighteen Levels of Hell.

The oppressive atmosphere made it hard to breathe. Even stranger was that every day, some lunatic chased Shen Wu around, spouting incomprehensible nonsense.

A demon groaned in the corner. Behind him, Mu Yi ran along, reading from a draft he’d written at some point: “...I want to caress your dark hair, your waist, your silky skin...”

Shen Wu looked at Mu Yi’s face, which resembled his own by about fifty percent, and fought the urge to feed him to the ghosts. Finally unable to take it anymore, he snapped, “Shut up!”

Mu Yi put away the draft with obvious regret. “All right.”

Late at night, Mu Yi squatted alone in the corner. He casually tossed some unidentifiable piece of meat that had rolled to his feet into the darkness. As wet chewing sounds gurgled out, Mu Yi leisurely turned the pages of his book: [Beneath their struggles came the sound of fabric tearing, followed by a rain of kisses...]

He’d picked the book up from a crack in the wall a few days ago. It was about two men, a subject he’d never heard of before, and Mu Yi was thoroughly engrossed.

With a snap of his fingers, a nameless flame sprang to life in the corner. The irritating chewing stopped abruptly. Mu Yi kept turning the pages. “Maybe I should go kiss someone, too?”

The firelight swept across the cover, where several large silver characters gleamed: The Pretty Cannon Fodder’s Days and Nights After Being Turned Gay, with an illustration: (Censored)

*

The classmate whose tongue was pulled out and steamed, the rich woman hung from an iron tree, the mother crushed beneath a boulder: all of them eventually became monster food. Everyone thought they could stay alive as long as they escaped this bloody, bizarre place. Just as Shen Wu was about to become the sole survivor, a voice suddenly rode the wind into his ears: “Welcome to the Hell of Wrongful Death.”

The familiar voice made Shen Wu stop in his tracks. Looking at the lover he had once kissed, he smiled bitterly. “So... you’re going to eat me?”

*

They say Hell is home to a beautiful but brutally savage monster that has eaten countless people. In truth, that monster is picky and obsessive about cleanliness. It hasn’t eaten a single one.

On an ordinary day, it finally took an interest in someone and decided to try a bite. It took on that person’s appearance and slowly drew closer...

The top, Mu Yi, turned gay after reading a danmei novel by a certain author (nickname: Mimi, given by Shen Wu)

The bottom, Shen Wu, is half-dead and inexplicably targeted (nickname: Fifteen, given by Mu Yi)

Global Doomsday Cheat Device Blurb

After being ambushed by an alien species, Shen Qian was reborn one month before the apocalypse began.

He brought with him the few scraps of his supernatural ability he had left.

Shen Qian, known in his previous life as the “Judge,” looked at the wilted little flower bud he had coaxed from the nearly depleted power in his hands and recalled the apocalyptic world that had been a waking nightmare.

[Order collapsed, and foreign powers openly revealed their designs on Huaguo. He watched helplessly as Huaguo’s order was shattered, then exhausted his powers under attacks from all sides, struggling to protect the last remaining patch of fertile land...]

It’s better to share the fun than enjoy it alone. Making trouble for others beats exhausting yourself.

After being reborn, Shen Qian took 0.0001 seconds to convince himself, then another 0.1 seconds to make a phone call.

“Hello, National Security Bureau.”

“Hello, I’d like to turn myself in.”

Prophets from the future usually describe the apocalypse with dread and fear, except when they talk about one person.

“He is the only thing I believe in in this dark world. His existence gives us a chance to catch our breath in the apocalypse.”

“He is the only Judge beneath the rule of order. If those vulgar villains hadn’t resorted to schemes and treachery, how could he have left us?”

“To you, prophecy is an inscrutable mystery. But he is a being who has descended upon this world!”

From this supernatural ability user who possessed the power of prophecy, the National Security Bureau learned countless details about the apocalypse, along with countless paeans to the “Judge.”

Among thirty thousand words of rambling, there were three hundred words of prophecy. As they watched the prophet go further and further down the road of being a “devoted fan,” the Bureau’s assessment of the “Judge” steadily declined.

Until Shen Qian appeared before them in person.

[Ability No. 0: Abyss]: By making contact, he can replicate another person’s ability and manifest it according to his own rank.

It was an ability with no visible limits and no way to predict its potential.

After watching Shen Qian replicate the most basic water ability, which the researchers thought was only good for direct attacks, and drain every drop of liquid from an alien’s body in a single breath, the National Security Bureau gave the assessment above.

[Reading Guide]: Apocalypse supernatural-ability novel. The author’s headcanon is extensive, so please don’t apply it to real life. The male lead is powerful. Definitely no CP.

Theme: Treat yourself well, live well, and treat everyone around you well.