Resting in Seclusion

I finished reading Qichi again. During the night shift in the intensive care unit, with the sound of instruments dripping in my ears, I could especially appreciate the meaning of the article. Love has many faces, and I feel them all at work. Qichi's love is so grand and passionate, yet gentle as water. So when I first saw Qichi in Tieba, I couldn't accept Qichi's final departure. But now, from a professional point of view, I absolutely cannot accept myself lying on a hospital bed, with everything maintained by various instruments. Seeing the person I love, the person who loves me, miserable all day long, while I am half-dead, unable to do anything. The love between Yu Qichi and Xi Nan is worth a thousand words. For Xiao Pumpkin, it is heartbreaking but will be remembered for the rest of his life when the person he loved deeply leaves her... After talking nonsense, I borrowed Ranran's words and hoped that this gentle morning star would always accompany Xi Nan in the future. (When I wrote the comment, I had already handed over the night shift. I am definitely not derelict in my duties. Thank you.)

Qichi left anyway. I didn't read the last two chapters at first. I always felt that Qichi and Little Pumpkin really lived together until they were eighty years old. Their every moment in the other courtyard was too heartwarming, but after turning over and over, I felt that this story was not complete. Finally seeing this, I explained some of the foreshadowings laid in the previous article. I lamented that Qichi's love is so great, but at the same time I felt that the shaky situation behind the calm was really cruel. Love has many faces. It was the forbearance when she pushed Xinan away resolutely, the constant guilt and low self-esteem towards Xinan, the cherishment that took everything into consideration for Xinan during her illness, and the pain and struggle of being unable to marry and have children with Xinan. I always remember that when Qichi asked Dai Qing to accompany Xinan to attend the red carpet, he said that he could not let his wheelchair block the skirt of Little Pumpkin. I always think about how painful and lonely Richichi felt when he was lying on the bed and watching the tall Dai Qing holding Xinan. He was so afraid that his own existence would block even a little bit of the light that originally belonged to Little Pumpkin, just like he always blamed himself for confining Xinan to his side, thinking that Xinan should have a broader world. Qichi is always like this. Behind the seemingly calmness is deep and hot love, which always wraps Xinan gently and silently. When a proud and strong person admits his helplessness and unbearability, it will always make people feel more distressed. Qichi prayed for more time for Xinan. Once the desire is opened, his desire is endless, but he can only helplessly watch his body decay day by day and lose control of his body. The little pumpkin is the only thing he can hold on to in those gloomy days. The story is ultimately a pity. It only took one day to read this story, but it took a week to gradually recover from the ending. Every time I think about it, I can't help but feel sad, for Qichi who is tortured by illness, for the gentle and strong Xinan, and for their unforgettable love. Thank you Teacher Ranran for writing such a touching story for Aidian. I wish the author and everyone who reads the article all the best.

Of course, after reading Qi Chi in the post, I felt extremely motivated and sad for a long time. I didn't click on the post again for at least half a year. After reading it again today, I understand more and more the many aspects of love expressed by the author. Qi Chi, Han Shan, An Nian, Dong Yejue, Yun Xiaoqing... Each one is different, but they show different aspects of love. Although selfishly, I hope Qi Chi will have a perfect ending, just like the Qin Zhiyan book version, which fulfilled the regret. However, as I grow older, go through the epidemic, and experience separation, I understand that imperfect endings are also a kind of perfection, real perfection. Thanks to the author for his vivid depiction of different male protagonists, which brought us lasting and different emotions!

After a few years, I read the ending again, and I burst into tears... Only then did I realize that the last words Qi Chi said to Pumpkin when he was dying were "Be good, don't be afraid." The unsaid words may be, I will always be with you, no matter how. When Pumpkin watched his beloved die step by step, his words were more beautiful and more powerful than any "I love you".

No matter how many times you watch it, you will still shed tears for Qichi. If you have been loved by Shen Qichi and blessed by his grand love, how can you accept the pain of losing him. Shen Qichi will not leave, he will become a star. From a materialistic point of view, I personally feel that Shen Qichi will also become a molecule that builds matter, will turn into wind and rain, and will inevitably meet Xinan again qwq

In this letter, I remember that there was another explanation in the Tieba, that the other courtyard should be given to Xinan, and I would stop by here in the future. .

The further you get to the back, the less you dare to look.

I come back and watch "Qi Chi" every once in a while. Although there are regrets, at least it has beauty.

I feel so distressed. Is there no extra episode that can save me?

Woohoo, where did Chapter 55 go?