A Worker in the West [Journey to the West]

I, Guanyin, honestly have no idea who I am anymore. The Tathagata says my mind was damaged when I came down to the mortal realm, and that I'll need some time to recover. Since there's only one spot for each job in the Western Heaven, he wants me back at my post as soon as possible (in other words, back to work). Fine, what can I do? (Those evil capitalists.) Life was peaceful for a very, very long time. The Western Heaven was as still as stagnant water, while the Heavenly Court was buzzing with activity. Well, look at that, Old Man Taibai has gone down to the mortal realm to recruit someone again. How interesting. The Western Heaven hasn't had a new face in ages.

I shouldn't have said that. That damned monkey!

Reluctantly, I took on the important task handed down by management and became the project lead for the Journey to the West, spending the whole trip cleaning up after the monkey.

As long as life goes on, the overtime never ends.

I hate it!

Jin Chanzi ran into trouble halfway through, so now I'm doing two jobs all by myself. I could cry for him.

On the Journey to the West:

"Why?" Sun Wukong asked.

"Because that's why. It's the logic of cause and effect: your mom hits you, and I laugh at you," Red Boy replied smugly.

Wukong was speechless. Wukong didn't want to talk, but Red Boy wasn't done.

"Oh! I forgot, you don't have a mom! Hahaha!"

Guanyin: The Western Heaven has so much damn nonsense. I'm exhausted to death.

Sun Wukong: Sweep across the Western Heaven and be yourself again.

Guanyin: …

Sun Wukong: Five hundred years ago, Old Sun wreaked havoc in Heaven. Five hundred years later, you, Guanyin, are wreaking havoc in the Western Heaven. Hey, I have to say, it's pretty great.

Guanyin: Thanks, but no thanks.

Something went wrong along the way, and the Bodhisattva was abducted by the White Bone Spirit. (Guanyin: Hey, hey, nobody told me this White Bone Spirit could be male or female!)

Guanyin: Benefactor, hear me out. The sea of suffering has no bounds, but turn back and you'll find the shore. Besides, I'm not Tang Sanzang, so why go to all this trouble to capture me? (earnestly)

White Bone Spirit: All right, holy monk. Here, open your mouth and eat some fruit.

Guanyin: Benefactor, the sea of suffering has no bounds, but turn back and you'll find the shore!

White Bone Spirit: No, don't call me benefactor. Call me darling~ I know this is rather sudden, but I really want to hear you say it~

Guanyin: ???

White Bone Spirit: (voice turning cold) Or I'll slice up that fat pig.

Bajie: ??? Why me???

Queen of the Women's Country

Queen: I would offer you the wealth of my entire kingdom to make you my queen.

Guanyin: (slowly and firmly) No way.

My resolve is firm. I will never be tempted by beauty and betray my boss!

Guanyin: I mean, no.

The queen, looking utterly charming: I don't believe you. If your eyes are truly empty, why don't you dare look at me?

Guanyin: (after a long silence) Why would I look at you? You're not as pretty as me.

Theme: Finding amusement in the hardships of working life