The Comments Say They Want to Adopt Me. Is That Really Science?

[A little plug for my upcoming novel, The Tyrant Raised by Bullet Comments. I really want to write it, so please add it to your collection. The blurb is at the very bottom.] My name is Baichuan Shijian, and I think... I'm cursed. I've lived through many lives, perhaps dozens, perhaps hundreds. I've lost count. Every time, I worked hard to survive, but I never made it past a week. Whenever I opened my eyes, I saw a countdown to my death in this life. Fires, earthquakes, falls from great heights, gang shootouts... Death was impossible to count, and impossible to escape. As I numbly waited for death in despair, colorful bullet comments appeared before my eyes. [I've been reading Detective Conan fanfiction for years. Is it finally my turn to appear? I'm so excited!] [Kiddo, don't be scared. I've been watching anime for ten years, so I can definitely help you survive in Conan's world for a good, long time.] [I'm here, I'm here! I can fall in love with the hottest character in a new series at a glance, so I'll definitely help you become a popular character in Detective Conan!] A bunch of bullet comments claiming to be my golden finger, and saying they could help me, appeared. From that moment on, my life changed completely. I was no longer a cannon-fodder character who died over and over in an endless time loop. I became a named character in a new anime, one created by the readers themselves, and I joined the mysterious organization in the series [Kiddo! There's a bomb in the apartment building! Run!] [I'm dying. The Black Organization should just rename itself the Water Organization. They're all undercover agents, and the Whiskey Trio is the worst of the lot.] [Shijian, that elementary school kid Edogawa Conan is a washing machine!] [Once your popularity hits the target, trade it for a secret identity character card. How can a Detective Conan fanfic protagonist not have a secret identity?] [Waaah, kiddo, don't push yourself too hard. Your health matters most. Can your popularity go up faster? There's so much blood.] Brilliant flames seemed to set the sky ablaze as Baichuan Shijian emerged from the dangerously unstable sea of fire. The boy reached out and brushed aside his blood-soaked silver bangs. A faint smile appeared on his bloodstained face, his voice nearly drowned out by the crackling explosions. "Honestly, just having everyone stay by my side is already enough..." Warnings: 1. This is a secret identity story. The protagonist will use secret identities. 2. The author has no logic or writing skill and likes to write whatever comes to mind without thinking. 3. The story is built around bullet comments, so there are a lot of them throughout. The author really likes them ( ). 4. The protagonist has a ridiculously powerful golden finger, and she loves the bullet comments. 5. The timeline is a jumble. It starts during the Detective Conan timeline, but the Police Academy group survives. 6. Everyone is out of character. The protagonist isn't firmly on either the black or red side, but is somewhere in chaotic neutrality (?). *The Tyrant Raised by Bullet Comments* Six-year-old Seventh Prince Xiao Shiyan was a forgotten, worthless prince in the imperial palace. Born prematurely and sickly, with his mother dead and medicine always on hand, even palace servants passing by could take a swipe at him. He looked unlikely to survive the winter. As he lay dying, a colorful sky screen suddenly appeared before his eyes. [This tyrant-raising game is pretty interesting. Xiao Shiyan looks like such a little sad sack right now. Nothing like a tyrant.] [His personal eunuch is about to betray him and poison him!] [He gets framed for stealing again and has his hand chopped off. Poor thing.] [Xiao Shiyan is so unpopular that even dogs hate him. Not one friend, family member, or lover will help him. In the end, the great villain Pei Ji schemes against him, and he dies without a complete body.] * To survive, Xiao Shiyan faithfully followed the sky screen's instructions on becoming a tyrant, diligently learning how to be one. The bullet comments taught him to recruit people on the brink of death and form factions to throw the court into chaos He obediently did as they said. He recruited the favoritism-peddling top scholar, the eunuch making money through shady business, and the villainous ministers who banded together to attack him. He took them all in. The worse they were, the better! "Your Majesty, you mustn't! These criminals will destroy the foundations of Great Xia!" Elder Xu cried in anguish. Xiao Shiyan replied casually, "Drag him away and behead him." "You can't! Elder Xu is a great servant of our country." A crowd fell to their knees. A faint smile appeared on Xiao Shiyan's pale face. "Drag them all out and behead them. Does anyone else object?" The bullet comments taught him to squander the treasury and embark on massive construction projects He wasted money and built, built, built with a vengeance. The Grand Canal, the protective city walls, anything that wasted the people's labor and money, he built! The ministers wept and shouted as they ran into pillars. "Your Majesty, you mustn't! The people can no longer bear such hardship!" Xiao Shiyan's reddened eyes narrowed with a smile as he summoned a young eunuch. "Come. Elder Xu wants to smash into a pillar, but he doesn't have enough strength. Give him a hand." "Give him a really big hand!" With utmost sincerity, all he wanted was to grow into a tyrant who would wreak havoc on the realm and be reviled for generations. And things went smoothly enough. The protagonist called for an uprising and began a rebellion, hoping to overthrow his tyrannical rule. But before the protagonist could act, the general who had once been branded a criminal dragged him into the court. The gentle top scholar said he would take him apart piece by piece. The young eunuch who had once nearly frozen to death asked how they could let him die so easily. The smiling villainous minister said they should maximize their gains and let the rebel army see the consequences with their own eyes. Even Elder Xu, who had tried to smash into pillars time and again, said fiercely, "His Majesty has gone to such lengths for the good of the people! The Grand Canal has prevented flooding, the extensive construction projects have provided homes for refugees, and the protective city walls have kept the southern barbarians out. These ungrateful fools still want to harm His Majesty!" "They deserve to die!" Xiao Shiyan: ...Would you believe me if I said I'm actually a tyrant? * To maintain his tyrant image, Xiao Shiyan kept a close eye on the historical records. Anything about building water conservancy projects, he deleted! Anything about repelling foreign invaders, he deleted! He deleted it all! In later generations, Xiao Shiyan was condemned for treating human lives as worthless and imposing exorbitant taxes! The bullet comments: [Exactly, exactly! That's right!] But many years later, after Elder Xu's autobiography was unearthed, researchers realized they may have misunderstood Xiao Shiyan, the tyrant who had ruled a thousand years ago. Xiao Shiyan had been so miserable in his early years that he was left with a sickly constitution. After seizing power, he could only use force to suppress a court full of aristocratic clans. The history books only recorded his tyrannical acts, without explaining why he had ruled that way or how it had changed the people's lives. For a while, Xiao Shiyan's life as a little sad sack went viral online, and the internet was flooded with people feeling sorry for him. The viewers behind the bullet comments: [Help! We really were trying to raise a tyrant!] Theme: Every person is unique.