Love. He had thought he would never feel that way...
For twenty years, she had regarded that calm, elegant man as someone as close to her as a father...
Yet as the years passed, her feelings quietly began to change...
The first time in his life he tasted jealousy, he could no longer see her as the beloved young girl he remembered. Helplessly, he thought of her, watched her, loved her, and longed for her. Just as he resolved to give up and let her be with the man she loved, her life was about to end...
She could hardly believe that the man before her, who had cherished and doted on her as if she were his own daughter, was the same person. His stern, deep-set eyes burned with another kind of feeling, one that stunned her. Everyone within his reach, even the childhood friend who had confessed his love to her not long before, dared not come within a step of her...
When hesitation and restraint give way to taking and possession...
When the tender protection of an elder turns into the fiery passion of a lover...
When those deep blue eyes, like the ocean beneath the moon, gaze quietly at her...
How will this bewildered yet clever girl choose?...
After finishing the story, I need to do a major revision. I'll take the suggestions and cut some of the supporting characters' material. There are far too many unnecessary passages at the beginning, and they don't fit well with what comes later. For now, please bear with this version. My skills are limited, and I'm ashamed of the result.
Revising takes a long time, and I feel like every part is dead weight. Please help me out.
If you find any chapters that feel unnecessary, leave a comment right there: “Sections X to XX, or up to XXX, are long-winded and pointless!”
I'm hoping for more sharp, incisive reviews. A brick to the face that hits the mark would be best, since that would help with future revisions. Thanks in advance.
Theme:
I haven't read it yet, I'll collect it first.
Um, not very good. The writing style is a bit childish and frivolous, and the plot is exaggerated and grandiose. In fact, it is good for novels or articles to be simple and ordinary.
She really doesn't love a woman like Lian Liqing. She says she is infatuated, but she is just a stupid woman who wants to satisfy her selfish love. They show a ferocious face when they see what they can't get. Such people only love themselves in their hearts. Using "love" as a threat is the most selfish thing. To put it bluntly, it's just selfish desire.
Damn Hai, why are you still Mu Xiu? Lian Liqing has too many scenes.
There are too few extras in this episode, please write more, it's not easy
Hai Yan, when will you open a new pit? I really want to see your new book!!!!
I like it. If there are other articles, I will definitely read them again. Many of the descriptions really speak to people's hearts. Generally speaking, I think the first half is better than the later part. It captures the feeling of missing each other but not loving each other, which makes people feel very distressed. I really want to read Jieyu's story about how he got along with his uncle when he was a child. I'd like to write a big extra story about it, haha!
The male protagonist is perfect, and so is the female protagonist, except for her extremely low emotional intelligence. There is no evil female supporting character in the novel, but there is a weak and affectionate male supporting character. The male protagonist did not fall in love with many women, nor was the female protagonist blindly kind and infatuated. Wenwen is very beautiful.
If it's 10 points, give it a point. I'll give it 8 points, not bad.
Personally, I don't really appreciate the plot of the infatuated girl getting the reward after all the hardships. I always feel that it is a kind of coercion. She should be willing to pay. You can't demand equal rewards from the other party because of your voluntary efforts. That is very unethical.