The Scum Top Won't Get His Comeuppance

In crematorium stories, the scum gong always ends up begging the heartbroken protagonist bottom to come back. But one day, the scum gong mutated.

So:

1: After I stopped loving him, the scum gong came to his senses.

Scum gong: Came to my senses? What for?

2: I got together with my scumbag boyfriend's uncle!

Uncle: No thanks. We're not doing that.

3: I'm done being a stand-in!

Sugar daddy: Bye means bye. The next one's more obedient.

Worlds to be determined

Theme: Relying on yourself is better than relying on others.