I always feel old when I read this kind of youth novel.
Two stories, two originally deserted women.
They are both loved, but one of them is afraid of losing herself. But the other one found another happiness after losing himself.
But after reading it, I always feel that this illustrates a truth: first love is fruitless.
Comments on "Li"
BY——commentator fan dye
Everyone lives freely in youth, can be silent, can be happy, everyone has a different life, but in the days that are too cold, in addition to a lot of loneliness, what is left is helplessness.
Liu's loneliness was caused by her overly rational mentality. She was once lively but the rationality rooted in her psychology pulled her in the direction of happiness, and she returned to loneliness. Maybe she was right to return to loneliness. A girl like that can have happiness, but she can't maintain it for too long. Life is not a financial statement that can be analyzed and calculated. What life needs is to be rare and confused. Liu can make happiness short-lived, or she can savor the happiness she once had when she is lonely, but she always uses rationality to analyze the gains and losses of every action she takes, and her life passes by her analysis and calculation. This kind of Liu is actually a tragedy, but such tragedies are always staged in different ways.
Qinghe's story is actually similar to Liu's, both of them keep a clear distance from everyone. The two of them are so special, and their special attention needs a male protagonist to discover, so we see the appearance of the male protagonist. Maybe Qin discovered Qinghe's difference gently, but he is not the one who finally understands Qinghe. Xing silently observed Qinghe thoroughly. Qinghe can have happiness, long-term happiness, but this happiness is a bit hazy and uncertain because they are still too young and have not experienced many people.
Both short stories revolve around "departure". Everyone is leaving, some are parting, and some are getting shorter and shorter. How should I put it? This is a youth novel, and it tells stories about middle school. In fact, it is really far away from me. When I think of my middle school, everyone knows that falling in love for the first time is a sin, which can be called a mortal sin. But we all know that first love is beautiful, but few people fall in love for the first time. In fact, I have seen many people similar to Liu, and I think Liu actually feels more fake to people. People like her are similar to cold fairies, who can only be seen from a distance but not close. She is too far away from life and unreal. Qinghe is closer to real life, her secret love, her tenderness, she will be melted by all her defenses in a small touch. The character Liu is too imaginary, her story is astringent, stiff and not soft enough, and there is some resistance. The character Qinghe obviously has the ignorance and coldness of a girl. She is more life-like, but she is also separated from the marks of many girls, and she still has a lot of alienation and is not friendly enough.
In summary, youth novels always give me a painful feeling, which is a little distant and a little deliberate, but it can easily bring back some childhood memories.
This kind of excitement can only be torture for her. The feeling of wanting to participate but not being able to achieve it will make her lonely. When the loneliness reaches a certain point, it will become a kind of disgust. --------------------------------------------------I like this sentence of the author very much. .
As for the two articles before and after, I think the author has made great progress. O(∩_∩)O~ The second article is obviously much better than the first. .
Also, as mentioned in the review below, the characters' perspective changes too quickly. Perhaps this is done deliberately, but it makes it a bit confusing to read. .
I have to say that the description of the friend of a friend is very confusing. I read it several times. .
In fact, the writing was very good at the beginning, but later on it felt a bit boring. I think it would be better if it was more lyrical and written in prose. .
The following comments are from tour group No. 210, I just forgot to add them...
Let's talk about the first article first:
It started with a short dialogue, leaving a small amount of suspense. As I continued reading, I felt more and more anxious.
The author used nearly one-third of the pen and ink to describe the character of "Liu". If it is a long description, it must have the necessary effect. However, after the whole article is finished, I still feel that it is incredible. How are these things connected together?
Let's talk about the details. Most of the author's sentences have the formula "... Of...". Usually readers have to think over and over again which part of the sentence is the key point and which part is the non-key point. One or two sentences in a paragraph is still acceptable, but if there are too many, it becomes very tiring. You have to consider every sentence, which seems very tiring.
I remember someone said that if the author wants to express a long sentence, the first thing to do is to break up the sentence, divide it into several paragraphs, fill in each paragraph, and then take it out and lay it out, which will make the article more colorful.
Regarding the story in the article, as mentioned before, one-third of the pen and ink is used to describe the character of the female lead, and the remaining two-thirds are naturally the plot. But the rhythm in the front was too slow, and the rhythm in the back suddenly became faster, and it felt like it was going downhill, like riding a roller coaster. Even by the last paragraph, I didn't understand what the author was trying to write.
Let's talk about the second article:
The beginning is the same as the first one, using some words to describe the character of the female lead. This can become the author's writing style, but it should also be avoided from being wordy.
The second part is different from the first part. A lot of plots are added to it, but the same mistakes as the first part occur, with frequent changes of perspective. If there is no deep writing foundation, changing the perspective over and over again will make people feel confused.
The ending of first love will make life beautiful no matter what. Even if you don't get the expected result, you will learn how to love. The same goes for Qinghe. Then his heavy heart slowly eased, and finally, this was a good ending.
Pfft~ Please don't revise anymore, I'm writing a review... Pfft
If I continue to change it, I won't be able to write anymore... I'm sweating
I always feel old when I read this kind of youth novel. Two stories, two originally deserted women. They are both loved, but one of them is afraid of losing herself. But the other one found another happiness after losing himself. But after reading it, I always feel that this illustrates a truth: first love is fruitless.
Comments on "Li" BY——commentator fan dye Everyone lives freely in youth, can be silent, can be happy, everyone has a different life, but in the days that are too cold, in addition to a lot of loneliness, what is left is helplessness. Liu's loneliness was caused by her overly rational mentality. She was once lively but the rationality rooted in her psychology pulled her in the direction of happiness, and she returned to loneliness. Maybe she was right to return to loneliness. A girl like that can have happiness, but she can't maintain it for too long. Life is not a financial statement that can be analyzed and calculated. What life needs is to be rare and confused. Liu can make happiness short-lived, or she can savor the happiness she once had when she is lonely, but she always uses rationality to analyze the gains and losses of every action she takes, and her life passes by her analysis and calculation. This kind of Liu is actually a tragedy, but such tragedies are always staged in different ways. Qinghe's story is actually similar to Liu's, both of them keep a clear distance from everyone. The two of them are so special, and their special attention needs a male protagonist to discover, so we see the appearance of the male protagonist. Maybe Qin discovered Qinghe's difference gently, but he is not the one who finally understands Qinghe. Xing silently observed Qinghe thoroughly. Qinghe can have happiness, long-term happiness, but this happiness is a bit hazy and uncertain because they are still too young and have not experienced many people. Both short stories revolve around "departure". Everyone is leaving, some are parting, and some are getting shorter and shorter. How should I put it? This is a youth novel, and it tells stories about middle school. In fact, it is really far away from me. When I think of my middle school, everyone knows that falling in love for the first time is a sin, which can be called a mortal sin. But we all know that first love is beautiful, but few people fall in love for the first time. In fact, I have seen many people similar to Liu, and I think Liu actually feels more fake to people. People like her are similar to cold fairies, who can only be seen from a distance but not close. She is too far away from life and unreal. Qinghe is closer to real life, her secret love, her tenderness, she will be melted by all her defenses in a small touch. The character Liu is too imaginary, her story is astringent, stiff and not soft enough, and there is some resistance. The character Qinghe obviously has the ignorance and coldness of a girl. She is more life-like, but she is also separated from the marks of many girls, and she still has a lot of alienation and is not friendly enough. In summary, youth novels always give me a painful feeling, which is a little distant and a little deliberate, but it can easily bring back some childhood memories.
This kind of excitement can only be torture for her. The feeling of wanting to participate but not being able to achieve it will make her lonely. When the loneliness reaches a certain point, it will become a kind of disgust. --------------------------------------------------I like this sentence of the author very much. . As for the two articles before and after, I think the author has made great progress. O(∩_∩)O~ The second article is obviously much better than the first. . Also, as mentioned in the review below, the characters' perspective changes too quickly. Perhaps this is done deliberately, but it makes it a bit confusing to read. .
I have to say that the description of the friend of a friend is very confusing. I read it several times. . In fact, the writing was very good at the beginning, but later on it felt a bit boring. I think it would be better if it was more lyrical and written in prose. .
The following comments are from tour group No. 210, I just forgot to add them...
Let's talk about the first article first: It started with a short dialogue, leaving a small amount of suspense. As I continued reading, I felt more and more anxious. The author used nearly one-third of the pen and ink to describe the character of "Liu". If it is a long description, it must have the necessary effect. However, after the whole article is finished, I still feel that it is incredible. How are these things connected together? Let's talk about the details. Most of the author's sentences have the formula "... Of...". Usually readers have to think over and over again which part of the sentence is the key point and which part is the non-key point. One or two sentences in a paragraph is still acceptable, but if there are too many, it becomes very tiring. You have to consider every sentence, which seems very tiring. I remember someone said that if the author wants to express a long sentence, the first thing to do is to break up the sentence, divide it into several paragraphs, fill in each paragraph, and then take it out and lay it out, which will make the article more colorful. Regarding the story in the article, as mentioned before, one-third of the pen and ink is used to describe the character of the female lead, and the remaining two-thirds are naturally the plot. But the rhythm in the front was too slow, and the rhythm in the back suddenly became faster, and it felt like it was going downhill, like riding a roller coaster. Even by the last paragraph, I didn't understand what the author was trying to write. Let's talk about the second article: The beginning is the same as the first one, using some words to describe the character of the female lead. This can become the author's writing style, but it should also be avoided from being wordy. The second part is different from the first part. A lot of plots are added to it, but the same mistakes as the first part occur, with frequent changes of perspective. If there is no deep writing foundation, changing the perspective over and over again will make people feel confused. The ending of first love will make life beautiful no matter what. Even if you don't get the expected result, you will learn how to love. The same goes for Qinghe. Then his heavy heart slowly eased, and finally, this was a good ending.
Pfft~ Please don't revise anymore, I'm writing a review... Pfft If I continue to change it, I won't be able to write anymore... I'm sweating