I’m Cleaning Up Abusive Romance Novels by Going Insane

Weibo: Dear-Jincheng

Blurb written on February 20, 2024

Jiang Lisheng awakened and was bound to a System.

It called itself the Couch Potato System and earnestly instructed her that she was the helpless, talentless heroine of an old-school angsty novel. She absolutely had to take every hit without fighting back, accept every insult without answering, and lie low whenever trouble arose. That was the couch potato code! She must never act like the previous Hosts and go around face-slapping people just for the sake of it, or the plot would grind to a halt.

“…” Jiang Lisheng paused to think. “So you want me to be a complete pushover?”

The System said, “No, I mean we should try to be couch potatoes.”

Got it.

It still wanted her to be a pushover.

**

That very day, her biological parents, who had only brought her home recently, pointed at her and cursed, “If I’d known you’d turn out so useless, I would’ve adopted the pig at the village entrance and called her my daughter!”

Not long afterward, under cover of darkness, Jiang Lisheng brought that pig home and left it right outside her parents’ bedroom. She also announced that she was giving the pig her name.

The System and her parents: ???

**

After that day, everyone in the Jiang family thought their newly found daughter had gone crazy.

Her fiancé, who had never liked her, sneered, “You’re so capable, why don’t you go ask my uncle to marry you? Why come to me?”

Before he had even finished speaking, Jiang Lisheng used her fiancé’s phone to call his uncle. “Hello. Would you like to get married?”

There was a brief silence on the other end. “Who is this?”

“Your nephew’s fiancée,” she said. “He told me to marry you.”

Her fiancé: “…”

Her fiancé’s uncle: “…”

The System piped up weakly: [Host, do you remember you’re supposed to be a pushover… I mean, a couch potato?]

Jiang Lisheng’s response: She was giving in, obeying, and being considerate, just as they’d told her to. How did that not make her a pushover… I mean, a couch potato?

Coming soon: The Supporting Villainess in a Fake-Death Story

In Buxu Continent, there was a beloved beauty famed across the wilderness.

They say the Demon Venerable slaughtered an entire city with one sword to claim her as his wife; the young lord of the Demon Realm killed a hundred mermaids to make silk gauze and win her smile; and even the aloof, otherworldly immortal on the Ninth Heaven lost his mind over her. In the end, the three factions went to war, laying waste to the world.

Only after the beloved beauty sacrificed herself did the three realms return to peace.

Later generations called her the saint who saved the world, and marveled at how devoted the three men had been to her.

If I were an outsider, I’d probably be moved too.

Unfortunately, I’m not.

I’m just an ordinary mortal. My husband was one of the thousands killed by the Demon Lord’s sword. The merfolk saved me as I fled, and I watched helplessly as they brutally tore out her pearl. Then I, along with everyone else, had my soul scattered in that three-sided war.

The bad news: I died.

The good news: I came back reborn with my memories intact.

The even better news: all three of them mistook me for the beloved beauty who died long ago.

Theme: Positive energy