A space-time distortion caused by an interstellar war.
Just before he plunged into darkness, he insisted on going with him.
At last, he could clearly see that man again.
But everything had become alien and frightening, something he had no choice but to accept.
The person before him had nothing but a wasteland in his eyes.
"Your appearance made me start to grow tired of loneliness."
In the end, the person twisted by love and hatred was left with nothing.
A life stripped of dreams and fighting spirit was so peaceful it left him numb.
In the final battle, his longing to win overcame everything.
A reckless, foolish fellow was tacitly allowed into his life.
Just rambling - -
Anyway, this is a sci-fi Naruto fanfic, with an irreversible Naruto/Sasuke pairing.
School starts on September 1. I'm working on a monthly update schedule. This is so painful.
P.S. I want replies =O=…
Good-looking>~<~ Come on come on
Show it to everyone from multiple angles. As for what angle, which angle, and how many aspects to write in total, it is all your own thinking skills + writing skills. These need to be continuously trained in future articles (similar articles, if you still write). I think fan fiction requires not only passion (one aspect) but also rationality. These two aspects are equally important for a high-quality fan fiction. This is the case with many of the translations we have read. Let's take an example from my friend. She once wrote a science fiction fanfic, and she needed to give the protagonists appropriate military ranks. Then she memorized almost all the Chinese and American military ranks, and then learned about the strategies and tactics. At that time, I knew what was going on behind the scenes of her writing, and I was really jealous. Generally speaking, I can see from this article that Yajun's writing style is constantly improving, and each paragraph is better than the next (this is why the writing becomes smoother and smoother). Really happy. I'm too verbose. The above is just a family opinion, so don't take it too seriously. I sometimes make mistakes. If there is a disagreement, then I will give in first. After all, enthusiasm is the first step!!
Then, I have never seen the subject of robots overwhelming me, so I am very happy to read this article. I think v2 to v4 is much more friendly, because even when talking about equipment, weapons, etc., No complicated proper nouns are used, so I can understand it immediately. Of course, most of the emotional scenes are very good, mainly in dialogue, and there are also details. The inner description can be chosen at will, because some novel authors can complete the protagonist's inner mind in the reader's mind after outlining it with pen strokes. Specific inner description generally requires the reader to experience the emotions at that time. The former tends to be rational and the latter tends to be emotional. Next, I want to ask you if there will be one or two large-scale battles next (science fiction is essential, especially when it adds military elements, right?). The first chapter is just a corner of a battle... If you want to write about a battle, no matter what kind of battle it is, you must understand the environment, terrain, what kind of countermeasures the enemy and we need, the strength, scale, application effects, tactics, etc. Of the battle.
However, your first chapter (V1) is indeed a bit redundant or a bit too rational and professional. I was a bit confused when reading it. There are many proper nouns (maybe it doesn't matter to you, but what do you expect from a kid who doesn't even know JJ?). You should consider the mood of the readers who are coming into contact with it for the first time and make a more detailed description. For example (just an example), a simple description of the appearance of the "Imperial Fighter" can give readers an impression... The most basic one, how big is it? It's best to compare it, is it like the American F-117A Nighthawk stealth fighter, or is it similar to the football field-sized flying ship in the Valley of the Wind... Anyway, I had no idea at the time. I am just giving an example. It needs to be described with key points. It is best to highlight the key points in the description. It is best to ignore the unnecessary ones.
It's not that I'm in a hurry to reply to you, Mr. Crow! Why am I so cold! They look at all your things very carefully! If you're not afraid of me being verbose, I'll just say it. Don't be angry. First of all - what about "not naming names"? I admit that my knowledge on the Internet is shallow, and I admit that I don't even know you, JJ! But I really didn't realize it at the time. In fact, I had seen it before!! Copywriter—The little girl is very talented and has little knowledge. I just don't know what a copywriter is! When I write articles, I always make outlines and so on, and I don't know how to do "copywriting". Next, I was heartbroken when your first chapter came up. From the perspective of science fiction fan works, this has already reached a limited scope in the readership... I think it was a bit hasty for me to draw a direct conclusion from your first chapter (forgive me). This should be the case. For fictional science fiction stories, especially those with XX content, you must learn from "Gundam Seed"... From the perspective of V2V3V4, you are moving closer to this direction, which is a very correct choice.
Tianxiao sits on the bench, not bad, good, author, please work hard~~
Silently looking forward to it... It's not easy to find a narration. I'm full of confidence.