[JoJo's Bizarre Adventure] A Guide to Raising the Dark Night Emperor

I thought Jonathan was a lousy actor, a fake innocent who's at most three levels deep. Who knew he was actually a clueless white dog, stuck on the first level all along? My thousand-layered schemes only trapped myself. I thought Kars was an emotionless exploitation machine, but did he really have to take the exploitation as far as the bedroom? Aren't they both my lifelong enemies? How can we have children? Two of them, no less. Jo roast pork, Santana. It's crystal clear who the father is. Also known as The Great Vampire Mother and We Want a Male Mom I've started a new story! Yay! I'll try first-person narration. The style is undecided, and there's no outline. Dio is the receiving partner, so you can start placing your bets: * JoDio stock: two clueless guys wildly guessing, a sure-fire investment * KarsDio stock: predator-prey domination, great growth potential Warnings: 1. Mpreg, mpreg, mpreg! (Possibly plant-based, referring to the green baby.) 2. A three-person ending or an open ending is possible. (I know I said to place your bets, but both gongs are so appealing. If I can't choose later... consider this an advance warning.) 3. The protagonist is a villain with a crooked moral compass. 4. I'll aim for a happy ending. 5. OOC. Theme: Predator-prey domination