The Boss Doesn't Eat Cilantro or Scallions

He came from a place unknown to all, and built his own White Tower atop the ice and snow. With an army of the dead at his command, he could go anywhere he pleased. Every page of the book in his hand recorded a place he had conquered. He possessed a beauty beyond this world, one that no words of the age could describe to anyone who had seen his face. He spoke little, often repeating the same few philosophical sayings. Whether sitting or standing, his manners and posture were always impeccable. People feared his mercurial moods and carefree ways, yet loved his civility and approachability. He would travel the world to collect tiny flowers, ride a dragon through eighteen bridge arches for no apparent reason, and meet the emperor of the entire continent wearing dinosaur pajamas and a rabbit mask, yet for reasons unknown, he would also destroy the whole world. Poets dedicated prefaces to him, emperors hid his portraits, and even his enemies built him a gilded cage to keep him imprisoned. He created the light, then destroyed everything. Countless people hated and feared him, and refused to believe he was dead. He is our lord, a hero and a demon king, and a legend. The name of this renowned man is... Please allow me to speak my lord's name, those sacred syllables: No Cilantro, No Scallions. This is the greatest legend on our continent, with the highest bounty on his head. When I was young, I too was a traveling bard who sang his tales! Dear traveler from afar, you ordered roasted pork knuckle. Do you have any special requests? No cilantro, no scallions, thank you, the hooded guest said stiffly. (I've crossed over as a Fourth Calamity.) [Players, please dress like a person during cutscenes with important NPCs.] [Players, please choose your own name carefully.] Theme: Love freely