The Yokohama Scumbag God Never Crashes

*Next stories: Sword Girls' Notes, The Little Black Dragon in the Batcave *Coming soon: [Crossover] When the Game Becomes Reality, I'm Doomed [Announcement: This novel is scheduled to go premium on August 25. There'll be a 10,000-word update that day. I hope all my little angels and bosses will support me! *bows deeply.jpg*] Blurb: Q: What's it like to be a notorious god of trash? A: Thanks for asking. One word: exhilarating. As a troublesome tsukumogami who blew up the Holy Grail and loves stirring up trouble, Xiao Wu plans to keep up her fine tradition after arriving in Yokohama, contributing to the city's bright future and becoming a well-rounded young person of the new era. It's a beautiful dream, but then her plane goes down. After flirting with people all along the way, Xiao Wu is awarded the honorary title of God of Trash by all the major organizations. Looking at her new title, then at her secret identities, Xiao Wu slowly wears a deranged smile. What's there to fear? Put on a secret identity and stay safe. Without my secret identities, I'm a good person. With them on, I'm the most beautiful little melon-eating squirrel in a field of rumors! The victims who've been thoroughly taken advantage of: Ptooey! I'd sooner believe a kind Russian guy than trust a word you say, Xiao Wu, you little jerk. One day, we're going to expose your secret identities and beat your ass black and blue. :) Xiao Wu, who thinks her pure little wings were merely broken by accident: ...??? Hah, go ahead and try. If you can expose my secret identities, I'll admit defeat. No fear.jpg #There's no way I'll ever crash and burn, not in this lifetime# #I was actually a respectable tsukumogami at first# #How can you call me a playgirl when I bend over backward for love?# Please note [especially the last item]: ★The protagonist's name is Xiao Wu, Wu! She's a replica of the sword Higekiri from history. Lots of headcanon. ★The story starts in Xiao Wu's final playthrough. Characters whose affection she maxed out in previous playthroughs will also appear. ★The protagonist is crooked as a tree in the early stages, but she'll straighten out later. ★Logic is pretty much dead. The characters are out of character. ★The author doesn't read BL and is a terrible person!!!!!! Recommendations Port Mafia Taught Me How to Be a Person · San You · And then I taught them how to be people [Crossover] I'm a Pro at Switching Sides · Nanji Hai Bao · Got caught red-handed by an executive right after switching sides :) The Youngest Daughter of the Zoldycks · Shi Qingqing A · What do the Zoldyck bigwigs think of all these men showing up to ask for their daughters' hands? Sword Dumpling Honmaru Operation · San You · Other people's sword warriors versus my sword dumplings... Wait, other people have dumplings too?! *Coming soon: blurb for [Crossover] When the Game Becomes Reality, I'm Doomed What would you do if one day you found out the game you played wasn't a game, and the government agents from inside it even showed up at your home? Deeply reclusive Mochizuki Chinaya looked at Konnosuke, who had invited her to become a Saniwa, and her first reaction was to... slam the door shut. Don't ask. She was afraid her favorite characters would show up at her door. Then she turned around and saw a certain sword tsukumogami leaning by the window, smiling at her. Looking at the Genji family's treasured sword with its gentle smile, Mochizuki Chinaya was panicking. Really panicking. Because the blade in front of her was her marriage sword. In other words, he was also the poor soul she'd (verbally) cheated on who knows how many times. Mochizuki Chinaya: Oh no, I'm done for. :) After finally managing to soothe the blade, Mochizuki Chinaya had just breathed a sigh of relief when she heard another knock at the door. The other men who'd come to call: Hey, is this Mochizuki Chinaya's place? Open up. We want to talk. The treasured sword's smile grew wider. Mochizuki Chinaya: ... I'm doomed. Goodbye. #Watch me die on the spot# #My sword boy came to life, but I feel like I'm about to die too# Theme: Every kindness will be repaid