The Evil Dragon Emerges from the Mountains, Rawr!

Because the demon-beast society is suffering from severe aging and a low birth rate, putting its population at risk, the director of the Demon Management Bureau, the Phoenix, opens a sealed fiendish beast barrier that has been closed for a thousand years and personally goes around persuading its inhabitants to form marriage alliances, so they can raise the next generation of little monsters. The fiendish beast barrier isn't very large. It's divided into the eastern, western, southern, and northern mountains. There's a dragon's lair on the western mountain. It has two evil dragons, an old one and a young one. One day, the old dragon said to the young dragon, "I found you a wife. She's the daughter of the pheasant king from the eastern mountain." Without a second word, the young dragon flew to the eastern mountain. He saw a beautiful, brightly colored bird pecking at its feathers by the lake. His lust took over, and he snatched it up and ran. When the old dragon came back, he took one look and said, "Wait, that's not the pheasant king's daughter! Take her back!" The young dragon reluctantly carried her back. A little while later, the young dragon brought another one home. The old dragon looked at him. "You didn't switch them!" The young dragon roared, "No way! That one was too ugly! I want this one!" The brightly colored bird shook its beautiful feathers. "Excuse me, but I'm not the ugly pheasant from the eastern mountain. I'm the most beautiful phoenix in the world, and I'm here to lead you out of the mountains." The old dragon heard that and said, "Ah, son! Your sense of direction is terrible!" The phoenix kept shaking his beautiful feathers. "I know he's complimenting my looks, but I should mention that I'm male." Old dragon: "...Son, your eyesight is terrible." "..." The young dragon was delighted. It was time to go out and see the world, then bring home the most beautiful monster in the world as his wife. After traveling around for a while, the old dragon called the young dragon and asked, "Found the prettiest wife yet?" The young dragon clicked his tongue. "No, no. None of them are as pretty as the phoenix, but he won't be my wife. He wants me to be his wife." Old dragon: "That works too!" A peerlessly gorgeous, supremely narcissistic phoenix gong X a dragon shou with an extreme pretty-face obsession who'll bottom for a handsome face Here are two upcoming stories of different genres. I'll probably start them one after the other. 1. *Do You Hire Human Garbage?* Bai Ou was the sole heir to a wealthy family that had everything, but an accident left him with a brain injury and made him a complete idiot. After suffering this misfortune, Bai Ou's father died of a stroke. Before he passed, he held Bai Ou's hand and could only mumble, "Eat well." From then on, Bai Ou remembered just one thing: eat well. Su Kuang, a workaholic in his thirties, was so rebellious and bad-tempered that nobody dared to control him. When his family pressured him to get married, he turned around and married an idiot, shutting everyone up. Bai Ou rubbed his stomach. "Will there be food?" Su Kuang replied irritably, "Eat as much as you want." Bai Ou's eyelashes fluttered. He stole a glance at Su Kuang, then smiled shyly. "Then... I'll marry you." Su Kuang suddenly felt a restlessness in his heart as he watched him. He snorted. "You're not that stupid, are you? Who said you were an idiot?" Bai Ou muttered softly, "I'm not an idiot. Only idiots believe what other people say." "???" When Su Kuang's mother saw that he'd actually married an idiot, she was so angry she nearly dropped dead on the spot. She didn't dare take on Su Kuang, so she went after Bai Ou instead. Su's mother: "I'll give you a million. Leave my son." Bai Ou furrowed his brow, weighing the importance of a million against food, and immediately refused. "No. I don't want it." When Su Kuang found out, he thought that this idiot wasn't all that stupid after all. Fine, maybe he could accept it. The guy was pretty good-looking, too. Maybe he could just... He folded his arms and asked smugly, "Do you like me that much?" Bai Ou lowered his eyes and thought for three seconds. "I like eating." Su Kuang had worked himself into believing he was loved, cocked one leg over the other, and was waiting for a confession. "??? Say that again!" A silly but adorable shou X a bad-tempered gong 2. *Bite Back: An ABO Story* There's a legendary regular customer at the pharmacy outside Jiangcheng University. In the three months since the start of term, he's bought 104 boxes of condoms, with six in each box, for a total of 624. That's an average of 6.933333 condoms a day. Never seen anything like it... Young people really are something. Then one day, the regular customer disappeared and never came back to buy contraception from their shop. The young cashier rested her chin in her hands, gazing longingly into the distance. Shyly, she asked their handsome pharmacy owner, Ming Qi, whose eyes shone like stars, "Boss, have you seen that guy lately?" Ming Qi smiled gently. "Who?" "That college student who always sneaks looks at you. He's pretty handsome, with fair skin, curly hair, and really bright eyes." "Hmm?" "Ahem... The one who comes in to buy condoms every day." Ming Qi pushed up his glasses. "Haven't seen him." After work, Ming Qi bought milk tea and cake and went home. The regular customer was lying on the bedroom bed. His bright eyes had grown dull, dark circles shadowed them, his face was deathly pale, and he'd lost a lot of weight. When he saw Ming Qi, fear glimmered in his eyes. Ming Qi unlocked the shackles on his wrists. "I bought milk tea and cake. You said you liked them." Qiu Ge trembled and backed away. "Please, let me go! Don't, don't kill me. Please!" A high-IQ O shou X a mentally ill A gong The gong really is mentally ill, a complete psycho. Don't read if you can't handle that. Theme: Fire safety is everyone's responsibility