Today's Elegant Magic Teacher

Fester was sure he'd make an excellent magic teacher. Until he received the not-so-excellent report cards from his lovely students. Fester was sure he'd make an excellent roommate. Until his roommate took care of almost all his food, clothing, housing, and transportation. Looking at his gray-eyed roommate, he remembered their first meeting, when the guy had looked him up and down and asked, "Are you really a teacher?" "Of course." I'm not just a teacher. I'm a refined teacher, and an excellent one, too. Sweetheart, the gods are my witnesses: one day, you'll feel guilty for doubting me so rudely. A painter who looks like he can't cook but makes amazing food X a teacher who looks like he can sing well but sings like a disaster Theme: