Every time A Nan dreams, it's like transmigrating. But why do other people get to strike an imposing pose, unleash a few domineering lines, and have underlings flock to them, bringing gold, jade, fine horses, luxurious carriages, and all kinds of beautiful women? When it's his turn, all he gets are horror-world big shots like Jason, Kayako, Sadako, Auntie Red, Dracula, zombies, Jack, and Bill?
▽-▽
A Nan thinks that if his life were a novel, the author would definitely be an evil stepmother, the sly, smiling kind with a dark side. Yep, that checks out.
☆?
Kui: I heard you think horror movies have gotten completely unoriginal lately?
Protagonist: Three-cent special effects, plot logic that costs nothing, the female lead spends the whole movie screaming, tripping, and holding everyone back, some movies have characters with zombie faces the entire time, the protagonist is recklessly curious, the male lead's logic makes no sense, or else the cannon fodder's logic makes no sense and their intelligence is abysmal. And you actually think that's scary?
Kui: ...No (why do you sound so right? I've got nothing to say)... No, no, no! You're just judging the whole genre by a few examples! You're discriminating against special effects actors, acting like nothing matters as long as it doesn't affect you, and being cold, heartless, unreasonable, and impossible! Since that's the case...
Protagonist: ? Heh. I'm not allowed to tell the truth? The truth is that, aside from a few classic thrillers from long ago, today's movies all copy the same formula and have nothing new to offer @&×㎡$??%...
Kui: Shut up, you bastard! I curse you to get thrown into a movie and experience it for yourself! KUSO! Apologize to the readers and viewers, hey!
Protagonist: Hah!
And then... the protagonist went off to conquer the stars and the seas. The end.
