[Gintama] I'm Not a Tsundere!

Standard Blurb:

In transmigration fan fiction, don't most Mary Sue heroines have some supposedly tragic past, get hurt, then wait around for someone to love them?

- Provided it's not Gintama, damn it!

The tragic backstory? Check. Combat skills? Check. A new identity? Check. Encounters with the canon characters? Check. Looks... well, that doesn't matter!

All in all, she should count as a Mary Sue now, right?

But transmigrating into Gintama while being bad at snappy comebacks and trash talk means she was doomed to lose from the start.

- I'm not bad at it! I just need a moment to work up a comeback! It's their fault for talking so fast!

At a time like this, all she has to do is maintain her domineering female CEO persona!

Sougo Okita: Isn't your persona that of a delusional, chuunibyou idiot with a head full of sticky white fluid, who's been soaking in an aquarium for 250 days?

Yuzu Yuu: You shut the hell up! Don't sully my dreams! And don't make yogurt sound so weird and disgusting!

Gintama-Style Literary Blurb:

Honestly, all those pretentious people are such a pain. That sadist, too!

One day, she'll twist that guy's warped personality into... Wait, did I pick up Kagura-chan's line by mistake?

Shoujo Manga Blurb:

It's not like she's petty. It's not like she holds a grudge. But every time she sees him, she acts so childish.

...It must be because that guy is too childish!

I'm not sulking... I just hate you, okay?

*

The heroine is a Mary Sue, but I'll try to keep her from being brainless.

The love interest is Sougo. They're childhood friends, completely at ease with each other, and already have a high level of affection from the start. The past will be shown in flashbacks.

The story alternates between third-person and first-person narration.