[This story is just a play on the homophones of Changcheng and Qingsen. The heroine is Gu Chensheng, and the hero is Chang Qing. Don't get the wrong idea.]
Having a secret crush is a heartbreaking thing. I've never told you I like you, yet a few words from you fill my dreams. I gaze at you silently by the window, waiting for the moment our eyes meet, hoping we'll understand each other without a word, though you're still so far out of reach. I fill page after page with your name, then crumple them up and toss them in the wastebasket. I carve your surname into my desk, only to scratch it out until it's blurred. My phone is full of your photos, and I stare at every profile that haunts my dreams.
That day, you held her hand and smiled so sweetly. You had no idea how helpless I felt... For three years, your figure has grown more distant, while tangled thoughts have made their home in my lonely heart. Liking you may be an endless cycle of longing, an endless stream of aching tears.
The mountain has trees, and the trees have branches. My heart delights in you, but you do not know.
Youth is awkward and uncertain, but perhaps a secret crush is what everyone's youth is made of! Maybe even many years from now, I'll still remember that you were once part of my youth.
Gu Chensheng's musings
