It's crazy. The second female lead woke up and mistakenly thought that Hong was the one who saved her. Hahahaha. What a crazy brainwash.
I feel like I hate the heroine more and more (/ω\) Let me go back in time and have sex with the hero
This heroine paints the wall with feces for other men. I can't bear it (╯°Д°)╯┴┴
(/ω\) The female protagonist won't stop practicing, the male protagonist will go up, go up, go up, haha. I want to see the heroine being deflated. What kind of mentality do I have? I smile evilly [waving my fan]
Ying Ying Ying, I love the male protagonist so much. I love the man so much.
The heroine is a bit scumbag. She silently lights some wax for the hero. Lan Hou silently takes out the small board and squats down, and takes out the popcorn.
Come on↖(^ω^)↗
Hello, author, I am the reviewer responsible for this long review: Uncle.
Today is July 16, 2016, reading progress: 20 chapters.
When I first read Guiwen, I was quite surprised, because I felt that the writing style was quite good and the writing was quite smooth. It was a very dramatic and serious style of writing. So as far as writing is concerned, it is definitely above the standard, so I won't go into details.
As I said just now, the writing style is very good, so I still had high expectations when reading the article. But how do you say something? The greater the expectations, the greater the disappointment.
From the surprise when reading the first chapter, to the anticipation of the second chapter, to the calmness of the third chapter... I was completely numb all the way to the eighth chapter, and I said goodbye manually.
To be honest, your beginning is really... Unattractive. The first thing that comes up is "the male protagonist who wants to marry the female protagonist comes to marry the female protagonist." Well, there is no need to use this old joke anymore... Of course you must use it, it's not impossible, as long as the writing is good-looking, it doesn't matter if it's bloody, readers can still take care of it!
Therefore, it is still acceptable to wrap up the bloody scenes well and come up with something new. But it's acceptable to be bloody, but it's definitely not acceptable to be dull, especially an extremely long and boring plot.
To be honest, I don't really care about the small interactions between the male and female protagonists in their daily lives. It's really too bland! Once or twice is fine, just to lighten the mood, but if it's too much, I can't bear it anymore!
People on earth all say that the most important thing in the first three chapters of an article is to "throw up suspense and attract readers." Even if it is a farming article, it cannot just be "a slow stream". There are still some small fish and shrimps in the stream that make two or three splashes of water from time to time. If you keep calm, isn't that stagnant water?
You said, oh my, I haven't explained my background clearly yet. Can't I explain the background and at the same time throw off the suspense? These two things are not contradictory.
With all due respect, many of the subplots in the first three chapters of Guiwen are actually very tasteless. Although the small plot of "picking up gold" is related to a later big plot, it only needs to be mentioned in one stroke, and there is no need to spend so much pen and ink describing it.
★Suggestion 1. Pay attention to throwing out suspense at the beginning of the article to keep readers curious about what follows.
Until I reached Chapter 8, I finally picked up a big shot on the road, but I didn't start writing about it, I just passed it through in a few hurried strokes. In fact, the emotional branch line of "Mr. Hong Luan" is also very dispensable. Even without this character, the heroine can still hate and despise the male protagonist. The dramatic conflict between the two people will not be reduced because of the lack of "Hong Luan".
Therefore, in order to write about "Red Luan" in detail, to omit the plot of "Beggars" is really like "losing the watermelon and picking up the sesame seeds", and such an approach of omitting the highlights and small plots will also make the readers feel unsatisfied.
The subsequent plot of "Sleeping in the Deserted Temple" also made the same mistake in its handling. The plot, which was originally quite readable, was suddenly turned into a tasteless story that was "a waste of time and tasteless", which was really frustrating.
Whether the details are appropriate or not is often related to the readability and interest of the article. This can also be seen from the number of clicks on each chapter. I believe the author must have also discovered that the clicks have dropped significantly since the first two chapters. The feedback from the data is the most objective and can best reflect the problem.
★Suggestion 2. Pay attention to the rhythm of writing, and it is important to be detailed.
It was not until Chapter 9 that we finally saw the belated big plot "The Death of Ashang".
Okay, I know that the author probably wanted to pursue a sense of "surprise", but in fact I was completely confused... This old lady was so casual. She just poked her granddaughter awake with a cane, which was the attitude of announcing a funeral! That's too much!
And the most important question is, who is Ashang? [Black question mark face
Ahem, let's not worry about what happened to Ashang, a guy who looked like a bitch before.
Hong Kong, this big plot really comes too unexpectedly. Darling, promise me, can you exaggerate the "storm is about to come and the wind fills the building" scene before anything happens? At the worst, it would be good to give some hints!
To be honest, when we write articles, we pay attention to a "response from before and after". Each plot must be able to justify itself, and it must be round, not far-fetched, and not obtrusive. The front and back must match, and they must fit perfectly.
You pointed to the outline and said in a particularly aggrieved manner, "That's how I designed the plot. There is no logical problem at all?" Yes, that's okay for you, but you have to know that you have an outline, but the readers don't. You know what's coming next, but the reader doesn't.
For many plots, if you don't give enough hints and clues, even if there are no flaws in your article, it will give readers the feeling of "divine unfolding."
Just like the section "A Shang's death", I strongly believe that your plot design is fine in the outline. But as for this plot, it should have a beginning and an end, rather than suddenly popping up and shocking the reader.
A good "surprise" plot should be "reasonable and unexpected" rather than an inexplicable divine development. But the prerequisite for being "reasonable and unexpected" is that you have to make early preparations, which is the detailed hints I just mentioned.
Readers are very lazy. It is impossible for him to read word by word and analyze your intention carefully. He does not understand modern literature, so where do so many ideas come from? What is a reader? Be it food and clothing, parents, customers, or God.
You can't expect your readers to care for you, you have to care for them.
★Suggestion 3. Give sufficient hints of details, don't be lazy, and try to speak clearly. Don't be secretive, conspiracy is more acceptable than conspiracy, and writing should still be frank.
There is another question. Actually, I don't quite understand why the author mixed the two major plots of "A Shang's death" and "Chang Dang's imprisonment" together. They were originally two climactic plots, but ended up being entangled and written unclearly.
It neither dealt with the weirdness and tension that should be expressed in the whole incident of "Ashan's Death", nor did it clearly express the emotional changes of the hero and heroine in the section of "Zhang Dang goes to jail".
In the end, it was not a wise move for the two incidents to end hastily together.
★Suggestion 4. Try to make the major plots as clear and distinct as possible. Never use interleaving to deal with two major plots when your writing power is insufficient. It would be better for everyone to be separated and still be good friends, rather than to get entangled and make a mess.
Since many aspects have been discussed above, I will briefly talk about character creation.
In fact, regarding character creation, I have said this statement N times. It is really a cliché. The most common mistake in character creation is "labeling". When a character comes out, he starts labeling him like a iceberg CEO, a cold goddess, a handsome young man, a peerless beauty...
I have always emphasized that we should use events to enrich the characters, use continuous plot development to perfect the characters, and refuse to flatten the characters. But now that I think about it, it's really true: I'm not afraid of stereotypes, but I'm afraid of sticking labels all over the place and labeling good people into different shapes.
Looking at the gold list, a certain Chicory's character creation is really flat to the extreme and not three-dimensional enough, but so what? Even if people are flat, they are flat in a distinctive, impressive and refreshing way. Isn't this the skill?
So, if your writing power is not enough, or you have never thought about creating a round character. Simply, make the facial makeup a little more extreme, and make it flat and pure.
The key word for this character is indifference, so be indifferent to the end and don't set up any soft corners in your heart.
The key word for the character inside is teasing, so keep teasing and don't get hung up on the occasional serious face that appears briefly in the pan.
We must adhere to the principle and policy of "one character will never collapse". Don't listen to the wind and it will be rain. Sometimes you are deep, sometimes you are happy, sometimes you are as cold as S, and sometimes you are as confused as black.
★Suggestion 5. Don't be too precise about the character design, as it will make readers tired.
Okay, that's basically it for this long review. Finally, I would like to solemnly declare that this long review is my personal opinion, and it is normal to have objections. If there is any offense caused by words, please apologize here first.
Finally, I wish you great progress in writing!
Illegal gathering produced by Chang Ping Pu
——Uncle BY
(╯°Д°)╯┴┴Nani?
The heroine confessed her crime by herself
It's crazy. The second female lead woke up and mistakenly thought that Hong was the one who saved her. Hahahaha. What a crazy brainwash.
I feel like I hate the heroine more and more (/ω\) Let me go back in time and have sex with the hero
This heroine paints the wall with feces for other men. I can't bear it (╯°Д°)╯┴┴
(/ω\) The female protagonist won't stop practicing, the male protagonist will go up, go up, go up, haha. I want to see the heroine being deflated. What kind of mentality do I have? I smile evilly [waving my fan]
Ying Ying Ying, I love the male protagonist so much. I love the man so much.
The heroine is a bit scumbag. She silently lights some wax for the hero. Lan Hou silently takes out the small board and squats down, and takes out the popcorn.
Come on↖(^ω^)↗
Hello, author, I am the reviewer responsible for this long review: Uncle. Today is July 16, 2016, reading progress: 20 chapters. When I first read Guiwen, I was quite surprised, because I felt that the writing style was quite good and the writing was quite smooth. It was a very dramatic and serious style of writing. So as far as writing is concerned, it is definitely above the standard, so I won't go into details. As I said just now, the writing style is very good, so I still had high expectations when reading the article. But how do you say something? The greater the expectations, the greater the disappointment. From the surprise when reading the first chapter, to the anticipation of the second chapter, to the calmness of the third chapter... I was completely numb all the way to the eighth chapter, and I said goodbye manually. To be honest, your beginning is really... Unattractive. The first thing that comes up is "the male protagonist who wants to marry the female protagonist comes to marry the female protagonist." Well, there is no need to use this old joke anymore... Of course you must use it, it's not impossible, as long as the writing is good-looking, it doesn't matter if it's bloody, readers can still take care of it! Therefore, it is still acceptable to wrap up the bloody scenes well and come up with something new. But it's acceptable to be bloody, but it's definitely not acceptable to be dull, especially an extremely long and boring plot. To be honest, I don't really care about the small interactions between the male and female protagonists in their daily lives. It's really too bland! Once or twice is fine, just to lighten the mood, but if it's too much, I can't bear it anymore! People on earth all say that the most important thing in the first three chapters of an article is to "throw up suspense and attract readers." Even if it is a farming article, it cannot just be "a slow stream". There are still some small fish and shrimps in the stream that make two or three splashes of water from time to time. If you keep calm, isn't that stagnant water? You said, oh my, I haven't explained my background clearly yet. Can't I explain the background and at the same time throw off the suspense? These two things are not contradictory. With all due respect, many of the subplots in the first three chapters of Guiwen are actually very tasteless. Although the small plot of "picking up gold" is related to a later big plot, it only needs to be mentioned in one stroke, and there is no need to spend so much pen and ink describing it. ★Suggestion 1. Pay attention to throwing out suspense at the beginning of the article to keep readers curious about what follows. Until I reached Chapter 8, I finally picked up a big shot on the road, but I didn't start writing about it, I just passed it through in a few hurried strokes. In fact, the emotional branch line of "Mr. Hong Luan" is also very dispensable. Even without this character, the heroine can still hate and despise the male protagonist. The dramatic conflict between the two people will not be reduced because of the lack of "Hong Luan". Therefore, in order to write about "Red Luan" in detail, to omit the plot of "Beggars" is really like "losing the watermelon and picking up the sesame seeds", and such an approach of omitting the highlights and small plots will also make the readers feel unsatisfied. The subsequent plot of "Sleeping in the Deserted Temple" also made the same mistake in its handling. The plot, which was originally quite readable, was suddenly turned into a tasteless story that was "a waste of time and tasteless", which was really frustrating. Whether the details are appropriate or not is often related to the readability and interest of the article. This can also be seen from the number of clicks on each chapter. I believe the author must have also discovered that the clicks have dropped significantly since the first two chapters. The feedback from the data is the most objective and can best reflect the problem. ★Suggestion 2. Pay attention to the rhythm of writing, and it is important to be detailed. It was not until Chapter 9 that we finally saw the belated big plot "The Death of Ashang". Okay, I know that the author probably wanted to pursue a sense of "surprise", but in fact I was completely confused... This old lady was so casual. She just poked her granddaughter awake with a cane, which was the attitude of announcing a funeral! That's too much! And the most important question is, who is Ashang? [Black question mark face Ahem, let's not worry about what happened to Ashang, a guy who looked like a bitch before. Hong Kong, this big plot really comes too unexpectedly. Darling, promise me, can you exaggerate the "storm is about to come and the wind fills the building" scene before anything happens? At the worst, it would be good to give some hints! To be honest, when we write articles, we pay attention to a "response from before and after". Each plot must be able to justify itself, and it must be round, not far-fetched, and not obtrusive. The front and back must match, and they must fit perfectly. You pointed to the outline and said in a particularly aggrieved manner, "That's how I designed the plot. There is no logical problem at all?" Yes, that's okay for you, but you have to know that you have an outline, but the readers don't. You know what's coming next, but the reader doesn't. For many plots, if you don't give enough hints and clues, even if there are no flaws in your article, it will give readers the feeling of "divine unfolding." Just like the section "A Shang's death", I strongly believe that your plot design is fine in the outline. But as for this plot, it should have a beginning and an end, rather than suddenly popping up and shocking the reader. A good "surprise" plot should be "reasonable and unexpected" rather than an inexplicable divine development. But the prerequisite for being "reasonable and unexpected" is that you have to make early preparations, which is the detailed hints I just mentioned. Readers are very lazy. It is impossible for him to read word by word and analyze your intention carefully. He does not understand modern literature, so where do so many ideas come from? What is a reader? Be it food and clothing, parents, customers, or God. You can't expect your readers to care for you, you have to care for them. ★Suggestion 3. Give sufficient hints of details, don't be lazy, and try to speak clearly. Don't be secretive, conspiracy is more acceptable than conspiracy, and writing should still be frank. There is another question. Actually, I don't quite understand why the author mixed the two major plots of "A Shang's death" and "Chang Dang's imprisonment" together. They were originally two climactic plots, but ended up being entangled and written unclearly. It neither dealt with the weirdness and tension that should be expressed in the whole incident of "Ashan's Death", nor did it clearly express the emotional changes of the hero and heroine in the section of "Zhang Dang goes to jail". In the end, it was not a wise move for the two incidents to end hastily together. ★Suggestion 4. Try to make the major plots as clear and distinct as possible. Never use interleaving to deal with two major plots when your writing power is insufficient. It would be better for everyone to be separated and still be good friends, rather than to get entangled and make a mess. Since many aspects have been discussed above, I will briefly talk about character creation. In fact, regarding character creation, I have said this statement N times. It is really a cliché. The most common mistake in character creation is "labeling". When a character comes out, he starts labeling him like a iceberg CEO, a cold goddess, a handsome young man, a peerless beauty... I have always emphasized that we should use events to enrich the characters, use continuous plot development to perfect the characters, and refuse to flatten the characters. But now that I think about it, it's really true: I'm not afraid of stereotypes, but I'm afraid of sticking labels all over the place and labeling good people into different shapes. Looking at the gold list, a certain Chicory's character creation is really flat to the extreme and not three-dimensional enough, but so what? Even if people are flat, they are flat in a distinctive, impressive and refreshing way. Isn't this the skill? So, if your writing power is not enough, or you have never thought about creating a round character. Simply, make the facial makeup a little more extreme, and make it flat and pure. The key word for this character is indifference, so be indifferent to the end and don't set up any soft corners in your heart. The key word for the character inside is teasing, so keep teasing and don't get hung up on the occasional serious face that appears briefly in the pan. We must adhere to the principle and policy of "one character will never collapse". Don't listen to the wind and it will be rain. Sometimes you are deep, sometimes you are happy, sometimes you are as cold as S, and sometimes you are as confused as black. ★Suggestion 5. Don't be too precise about the character design, as it will make readers tired. Okay, that's basically it for this long review. Finally, I would like to solemnly declare that this long review is my personal opinion, and it is normal to have objections. If there is any offense caused by words, please apologize here first. Finally, I wish you great progress in writing! Illegal gathering produced by Chang Ping Pu ——Uncle BY