Peace Through the Ages

She thought all was well, that her longing would flow east like a stream, and that everything would take its course. But she never expected life to be so unpredictable.

1. When he was very young, he sometimes wondered what his mother, the Consort, had been like. How did she compare to the Empress? Was she fat or thin? Tall or short? Beautiful or ugly?

He couldn't even picture her, because he had no memory of her at all.

Compared with the other princes, life in the palace was rather difficult. His master had secretly helped him a great deal.

He practiced his martial arts every day, and as the days went by, life wasn't so hard to endure.

He didn't know whether life had hardened him or whether his feelings had always been shallow. Hatred had never been part of his meager emotions. Having parents or not seemed to make no difference, and it was something he could bear.

None of the other princes had ever come looking for trouble with him. He knew they were all busy studying the arts of war and governance, busy currying favor with their father on the imperial throne, and busy trying to secure an edict naming one of them the next emperor after their father's death.

He had never been interested in any of it.

Especially after he once sneaked out of the palace and accidentally overheard the ministers in the great hall pressuring his father into making certain decisions. At that moment, he suddenly felt pity for the so-called Son of Heaven. What did it matter if he possessed the whole realm? Not every decision could go his way. What was a life like this even for: glory or wealth? Fame or power?

His mother had expended every effort, only to be sent to a royal temple for the rest of her life.

In truth, he thought that place was far better for her than the imperial palace.

2. Until she was three, she believed her master was the only family she had in the world. He was the only one by her side.

When she was three, she sneaked down the mountain and went to the market in a little town below. It was bustling. Amid the crowds, she heard a little girl call, "Daddy, I want candied hawthorns." She was puzzled. What was a daddy?

She stood where she was and thought for a long time, but couldn't come up with an answer.

As she was about to leave, she heard a little boy call, "Mommy, I want candied hawthorns." She was puzzled again. What was a mommy?

Why did children ask their daddy and mommy for candied hawthorns? Were they delicious?

She watched the little girl walk past, licking a bright red skewer. The woman called her mommy wore a gentle, beautiful smile.

Without thinking, she walked up to the candied hawthorn vendor and stared unblinkingly at the countless bright red skewers in front of him.

"Can I try one?"

"Little girl, one skewer costs two coins. Do you have any money?"

She had no money, so in the end she traded a porcelain bottle that held detoxification pills for a skewer. She licked it. It was sweet. She bit into it. It was sour. Was it tasty? She didn't know. Was this what people meant by tasty?

When she returned to the mountain, she asked her master what daddies and mommies were, and why it seemed every child had one but her.

Her master patted her head and said, "You'll understand when you grow up."

But he never told her how old she had to be to count as grown up.