A Bound Spirit's Quick Transmigration

It's very confusing. Keep up the good work.

What does this story mean

The ultimate big boss was conquered just like that? I go

The subject matter is pretty good, but the writing style needs to be revised. Hey, hey, hey, should I rewrite it?

! ! ! Author Jun, I just found out if the cover is Tianyi (*/ω\*)

Am I not the only one who went to Baidu to figure out what "vomiting after eating" means?

Jun Shi: It's Jun Shi, not a military advisor!

Why is the male protagonist called Mr. Hua?

Hello, the author of Mengmeng. I am here to comment. Please forgive me for any shortcomings. Thank you for your support~~ In fact, when I first saw the title of the article, I was actually a little confused, because it had never touched on the subject of fast travel or earthbound spirits. However, I still covered my choked eyes because I was afraid that it was not something I was familiar with. My ideas might be different from the author's, so you don't need to think too carefully about my comments. Everything should be based on the main line that you think~~ The joke ends, and the text begins. Title of the article: Simple and clear, it directly points out the main body of the article. Well done, thumbs up. Cover & Copywriting: It's cute, and it also captures the character traits of the host and the system master very well, but there are actually both advantages and disadvantages to writing the content of the round this way. The advantage is that people who are interested in the content of the round will definitely come in without hesitation; the disadvantage is that it spoils the novel and reduces the novelty of the story behind the article for readers. I suggest the author give it more thought. Writing style: The article is very smooth. Including the big complaints, the part is also quite smooth. It doesn't feel like you are complaining just for fun. Moreover, each person's dialogue is very suitable for the situation, and they are used just right. Another thing worth mentioning is why the chatty Cao Xiaomu is no match for Chang Qing when he meets Chang Qing. Wow, it feels like the waves behind the Yangtze River hit the waves ahead, and they hit the beach. Or is it that Cao Xiaomu only talks to the system? I haven't finished reading it yet. If this is the case, it should be the story of "Aloof Cao Mu Jun meets true love and turns into a chatty one in a second." It's quite cute, so keep going. Speaking of Changqing, the author's Hundred Thousand Whys didn't find him annoying, but found him very pure. Probably because I imagined the image of him raising his head with an innocent look on his face and asking Xiao Cao, "Master, why don't you..." "Master, why did I..." "Master, why is this...". 23333. However, the author's visual sense is still lacking. It is recommended that the author add some descriptive scenes appropriately, such as Changqing biting his finger, twitching the corner of his mouth, which are more common or other scenes that the author thinks are better, to enrich the visual sense and prevent the story from being told flatly. Plot: Personally, I think the plot is a little weak. For example, in the first story, the chatty girl's battle with the "Black Mountain Old Demon" (not really) is a bit simple. It seems that everyone knew he was the bad guy from the beginning, and then they didn't have any major twists or turns. But since I haven't finished reading it, I can't say what plot the author buried. Maybe there will be a twist later~~ For now, because the word count is only 30,000, the story has not been fully developed, and there are not many obvious problems at the moment. I hope that I can work hard to expand the picture and make the plot more thrilling, such as using interludes and other techniques. I also hope that I can continue to maintain the advantages. Overall, the story is pretty good. I personally suggest that Cao Xiaomu could be more talkative~~~Come on, author [Pu Miao Grocery Store·Quan Asu Produced]

Want! ! ! Damn, you love to look at my sincere eyes, are there any flashes of bulingbuling?