I never thought I could really go back to ancient times, I never thought I would fall in love with the emperor, and I never thought...
Making an appointment, the love and fate of the next life are just a blink of an eye for me, but you have been waiting for decades...
What? Wrong again? Damn it! Well, let me wait for you this time!
From the Qing Dynasty to the present, haven't you just slept for a while?
----------------------------
Http://myfreshnet. Com/GB/literature/li_romance/100051281/
Lan Zai Xian. Com, adults who like "Yong" should support it and vote!
Note: All my works are not allowed to be reprinted at the moment. Apart from this site, the only places where I can simultaneously upload them are Xian. Com, 91 Literature. Com, Jinyang. Com and Lanyan Yeban Academy. Please delete other unauthorized reprints. Thanks!
Conception:
Reader comments
苦等更新的人你也伤不起……
孩子，快点吧，人家一直等着呢……
The story is very attractive and the author's writing is very delicate! Looking forward to the update!
Haha, thank you everyone for supporting me, I will continue to work hard!
风啊！！！彩虹之子有木有！！
Woohoo, is there any hope of updating this article...
I really like the Lord of Ebon Blade who is so stiff (…) like a dead man
Ever since I read the Silver Hand: Black Edge article, I have been stuck in this pair of CPs and can't extricate myself. Finally, there is an article that is not a trap. QAQ
Daxing, do you mean that these two people will be seriously injured in the future?
Phew, Huang Bamboo Grass, but Siya succeeded hahaha
喜欢纯情类故事~~~~\\(≧▽≦)/~文文已收，大大加油！
I almost thought someone was the first male.
加油更努力更使劲更文吧~~~~十分期待呀
顶一下 顶一下！
I'm so happy to see the update O(∩_∩)O~~
Although it's a bit slower, just don't give up.
I'm not in the mood to read. Maybe it's because I don't like this kind of slow-burning type.
Forget that you can't do it!
Why not update it??????????
You came back and updated, don't be fooled.
I looked again and found that I really seemed to have forgotten. . . . . . I really need to watch it again. . . . . .
Author, you are...
好好看，加油加油
For this article, I want to analyze it from two aspects: one is the wording and sentence making, and the other is the content of the article.
The background of this article is an imaginary ancient time. The words and sentences can be easy to understand, but they should not be too time-travelling. As for this article, I often feel like traveling through time and space.
Let us give a few examples:
[Obtain a room] can actually be replaced by [Stay overnight]; [Drive as slowly as possible] can use [Drive] to use a carriage, but I have never heard of [Driving a carriage].
The important thing is that these time-travel lines are not from the mouth of the time-travel heroine, so it makes people look very awkward.
Such language appears in many places in the text. Especially in the processing of character dialogue, it makes people feel that everyone in this article has actually traveled through time. Words such as "feudal", "marriage" and "freedom" appear in ancient dialogues that are almost modern, which makes me shout that it is too time-traveled. Although this article is a time-travel article, the general background is still in ancient times, so for this kind of issues, the author needs to work more on the choice of words and sentences.
In addition, there are also minor problems with the sentences in the article.
["Oh, you're not me, you won't understand." Wei Chenfeng seemed to really not want to talk about this topic, so he quickened his pace.
["Look, actually, Ziyu is very kind to you. She has spent so much thought on you, even if your heart is made of iron, it should melt."]
Almost every sentence. Think carefully, are these sentences paused mechanically? The continuity is interrupted by commas, which makes people feel short of breath when reading.
Writing articles requires long and short sentences to be well-proportioned, and skillful use of conjunctions will give the article a sense of flow. When you finish writing a sentence or a paragraph, be sure to read it again and again. See if it is coherent and smooth. This is the basic skill of writing. Only when the sentences in the article flow smoothly will the readers read on.
The above are the issues that, in my personal opinion, need to be paid attention to when choosing words and sentences in this article. As for the content of the article, there are two words that can describe it - stiff.
It can be seen that this article written by the author has a lot of story and content. The author arranged the script and asked the protagonists to perform the contents of the script in turn. The story is a good one, but the connections between the stories are too rigid. It's like a fine puppet connected by rough wires, making the puppet's performance extremely stiff. In this regard, I also give two examples in the article as an analysis.
A plot about delivering eggs to an old lady. In the previous chapter, they were still arguing about whether to take the egg, but in the second chapter, the heroine burst into tears because she could see the change in the hero from an egg. Although there are details that reveal the true feelings, the author handles the connection between these two chapters too abruptly. In short, this matter is a question of whether to leave a name for doing good deeds, but the author can actually diverge from this matter to a general philosophy of life, which is really overwhelming.
In the second place, the heroine was renamed Duan Jinse. Since the heroine changed her name, whenever the heroine's name is mentioned in the following storyline, she will always be named Duan Jinse. When the author wrote this, did he ever think that after the story in the previous ten chapters, the name Gu Xiaoxi has been deeply rooted in the hearts of the people, and if he suddenly changed the name to tell the story, the readers would be unable to change his mind for a while? Therefore, is it necessary to gradually transition to the name Duan Jinse? Besides, when the male and female protagonists are alone together, I think Gu Xiaoxi's real name is a more convenient name.
The above are two typical manifestations of this article's handling of undertaking issues. Every turn in the story is a sharp turn, with no appropriate transition chapters or plots. As a result, the overall reading of the article is very smooth in small stories, but once there are big scenes and big plot changes, it will appear stiff and abrupt.
In addition, it is not easy for the author to write the article, which requires hundreds of thousands or hundreds of thousands of words, so it is reasonable for other words to appear. But as the first chapter serves as the facade of the entire article, it would be unjustifiable if there are other words. Therefore, I hope the author can correct the typos in the first few chapters.
The above is the personal opinion of Shenxianjiang, please forgive me if there is any inappropriateness.
It's time for you to update~~ Lift up the little whip~~~ Whip you~~~
O∩_∩oDon't abandon the trap~~
Ah... I forgot to rate...
然然你个魂淡！！！给我改结局！！QAQ
It's okay to portray Hu Sanlang as a young man, I like him anyway. It's not a sad feeling, it's not a holy feeling, it's not a masochistic feeling, it's not a blowjob feeling, it's not a novice feeling, it's not a queen feeling (I also like this feeling very much), it's not a monster feeling. It's a very normal little Shou, without the drama of suddenly becoming stronger. When a comfortable life is at your fingertips, he runs away for love. Slowly starting from a young boy, I managed my life in a very orderly and practical way, giving me a sense of solidity. Please support me, author.
还没有过瘾！5555~~
Well, the highest level of Tianxia II is now level 80. NND just spent 2700 to buy a level 77 braised Tianjihao. As a result, the server transfer test was actually opened. What kind of world is this~!
It's really exciting, Xiaocha, when will the lower part of Xiaomi be available?
苦等更新的人你也伤不起…… 孩子，快点吧，人家一直等着呢……
The story is very attractive and the author's writing is very delicate! Looking forward to the update!
Haha, thank you everyone for supporting me, I will continue to work hard!
风啊！！！彩虹之子有木有！！
Woohoo, is there any hope of updating this article... I really like the Lord of Ebon Blade who is so stiff (…) like a dead man Ever since I read the Silver Hand: Black Edge article, I have been stuck in this pair of CPs and can't extricate myself. Finally, there is an article that is not a trap. QAQ
Daxing, do you mean that these two people will be seriously injured in the future?
Phew, Huang Bamboo Grass, but Siya succeeded hahaha
喜欢纯情类故事~~~~\\(≧▽≦)/~文文已收，大大加油！
I almost thought someone was the first male.
加油更努力更使劲更文吧~~~~十分期待呀
顶一下 顶一下！
I'm so happy to see the update O(∩_∩)O~~ Although it's a bit slower, just don't give up.
I'm not in the mood to read. Maybe it's because I don't like this kind of slow-burning type.
Forget that you can't do it!
Why not update it??????????
You came back and updated, don't be fooled.
I looked again and found that I really seemed to have forgotten. . . . . . I really need to watch it again. . . . . .
Author, you are...
好好看，加油加油
For this article, I want to analyze it from two aspects: one is the wording and sentence making, and the other is the content of the article. The background of this article is an imaginary ancient time. The words and sentences can be easy to understand, but they should not be too time-travelling. As for this article, I often feel like traveling through time and space. Let us give a few examples: [Obtain a room] can actually be replaced by [Stay overnight]; [Drive as slowly as possible] can use [Drive] to use a carriage, but I have never heard of [Driving a carriage]. The important thing is that these time-travel lines are not from the mouth of the time-travel heroine, so it makes people look very awkward. Such language appears in many places in the text. Especially in the processing of character dialogue, it makes people feel that everyone in this article has actually traveled through time. Words such as "feudal", "marriage" and "freedom" appear in ancient dialogues that are almost modern, which makes me shout that it is too time-traveled. Although this article is a time-travel article, the general background is still in ancient times, so for this kind of issues, the author needs to work more on the choice of words and sentences. In addition, there are also minor problems with the sentences in the article. ["Oh, you're not me, you won't understand." Wei Chenfeng seemed to really not want to talk about this topic, so he quickened his pace. ["Look, actually, Ziyu is very kind to you. She has spent so much thought on you, even if your heart is made of iron, it should melt."] Almost every sentence. Think carefully, are these sentences paused mechanically? The continuity is interrupted by commas, which makes people feel short of breath when reading. Writing articles requires long and short sentences to be well-proportioned, and skillful use of conjunctions will give the article a sense of flow. When you finish writing a sentence or a paragraph, be sure to read it again and again. See if it is coherent and smooth. This is the basic skill of writing. Only when the sentences in the article flow smoothly will the readers read on. The above are the issues that, in my personal opinion, need to be paid attention to when choosing words and sentences in this article. As for the content of the article, there are two words that can describe it - stiff. It can be seen that this article written by the author has a lot of story and content. The author arranged the script and asked the protagonists to perform the contents of the script in turn. The story is a good one, but the connections between the stories are too rigid. It's like a fine puppet connected by rough wires, making the puppet's performance extremely stiff. In this regard, I also give two examples in the article as an analysis. A plot about delivering eggs to an old lady. In the previous chapter, they were still arguing about whether to take the egg, but in the second chapter, the heroine burst into tears because she could see the change in the hero from an egg. Although there are details that reveal the true feelings, the author handles the connection between these two chapters too abruptly. In short, this matter is a question of whether to leave a name for doing good deeds, but the author can actually diverge from this matter to a general philosophy of life, which is really overwhelming. In the second place, the heroine was renamed Duan Jinse. Since the heroine changed her name, whenever the heroine's name is mentioned in the following storyline, she will always be named Duan Jinse. When the author wrote this, did he ever think that after the story in the previous ten chapters, the name Gu Xiaoxi has been deeply rooted in the hearts of the people, and if he suddenly changed the name to tell the story, the readers would be unable to change his mind for a while? Therefore, is it necessary to gradually transition to the name Duan Jinse? Besides, when the male and female protagonists are alone together, I think Gu Xiaoxi's real name is a more convenient name. The above are two typical manifestations of this article's handling of undertaking issues. Every turn in the story is a sharp turn, with no appropriate transition chapters or plots. As a result, the overall reading of the article is very smooth in small stories, but once there are big scenes and big plot changes, it will appear stiff and abrupt. In addition, it is not easy for the author to write the article, which requires hundreds of thousands or hundreds of thousands of words, so it is reasonable for other words to appear. But as the first chapter serves as the facade of the entire article, it would be unjustifiable if there are other words. Therefore, I hope the author can correct the typos in the first few chapters. The above is the personal opinion of Shenxianjiang, please forgive me if there is any inappropriateness.
It's time for you to update~~ Lift up the little whip~~~ Whip you~~~
O∩_∩oDon't abandon the trap~~
Ah... I forgot to rate...
然然你个魂淡！！！给我改结局！！QAQ
It's okay to portray Hu Sanlang as a young man, I like him anyway. It's not a sad feeling, it's not a holy feeling, it's not a masochistic feeling, it's not a blowjob feeling, it's not a novice feeling, it's not a queen feeling (I also like this feeling very much), it's not a monster feeling. It's a very normal little Shou, without the drama of suddenly becoming stronger. When a comfortable life is at your fingertips, he runs away for love. Slowly starting from a young boy, I managed my life in a very orderly and practical way, giving me a sense of solidity. Please support me, author.
还没有过瘾！5555~~
Well, the highest level of Tianxia II is now level 80. NND just spent 2700 to buy a level 77 braised Tianjihao. As a result, the server transfer test was actually opened. What kind of world is this~!
It's really exciting, Xiaocha, when will the lower part of Xiaomi be available?