I, Liu Yingrou, peerless beauty under heaven, stunningly lovely, delicate as a pear blossom in the rain and a begonia beaded with dew, beautiful enough to topple cities and kingdoms, the most gorgeous of all, so beautiful fish sink and geese fall, the moon hides and flowers blush, flowers bloom at my sight and people adore me, while even carriages crash before they can blow a tire and die of embarrassment; shy and demure, I half-hide my face behind my pipa, then glance back with a smile that captivates a hundred hearts. I’m magnanimous enough to forgive the small-minded, and broad-minded enough to sail a boat in my prime minister’s belly. I, Liu Yingrou, have an announcement for everyone! Something very important! While I was using the toilet, I got sucked into the toilet bowl and, in grand style, transmigrated!
