Falling for Lin Yinuo

Hahahaha, that's great! Abuse, abuse, abuse!

I got this idea from the comments, so luckily I clicked on the first chapter, otherwise I would have missed the good writing... So, it's time to change the copy and name!

Haha, funny, looking forward to the follow-up. . .

The writing is good and the plot does not drag on. Picture hangs up Let's talk about flaws. There are several small mistakes in your first chapter. "What? What are you talking about?" The man's surprised and angry voice suddenly emerged from the careless whispering of the piano. The context of the first sentence at the beginning doesn't feel very smooth. Please change it. Later, the man's surprised and angry voice suddenly emerged from the whispering and careless piano. Is this better? Using whispering and careless to describe the sound of the piano, whether you want to create an atmosphere or a way of personification, feels a bit strange, so it is best to reconsider it. What kind of disgusting man could say such disgusting words to pollute his mood? ——What a disgusting man to say such disgusting words, it is simply ruining his mood. The tone is sarcastic and mean, but he actually has some dark humor on his mind. ——There is still something to think about As for the female guest opposite, she looks ordinary and wears ordinary clothes. ——Looks ordinary and wears ordinary clothes There are a lot of adjectives in the article that I don't think fit that well. I know the author wants to create an atmosphere, but it would be better if they fit more closely. I won't write out the rest one by one. I'm just here to be a passerby, but I think that as the first chapter of an article, you can't review it over and over again. Whether it's the context in the conversation, adjectives, or punctuation, it's best to be more careful. This will at least leave a better impression on the viewer. This is just my personal opinion, please forgive me if I am wrong.

I really like such a hard-working author. The meal was very lively.

Rate and support! Dongfang entered the soup pool? So curious. I hope the author and classmates will write more articles!

Nice. Keep up the good work! Do we need to overhaul everything?

Beauty is not sexy enough.

Continue to follow Yun Xiaoduo!

Interesting, it's better to have more blank lines, it looks more comfortable!