The Husband I Stole

The article has been revised recently, please forgive me! Sorry!

Oh. . This rhythm. . . . I thought it was just a casual little love affair.

What a conspiracy. . . . . . . .

Ah. More. . . Cats are so diligent. . . . Just for your diligence. . . Support

What I am most worried about is that the male protagonist will create a love trap, and then the female protagonist will fall in love with the male protagonist. The male protagonist is dismissive of the female protagonist. . After the female protagonist was frustrated by him, the male protagonist suddenly realized that he fell in love with her. . . Or it will be so miserable. . . . . . Well, one person's preference. I prefer the male protagonist to fall in love with the female protagonist first. I hope the heroine is more heartless

Does it look good? . . I laughed out loud. . Reminds me of bandits rushing forward. . My favorite female character

Hello, author, I am Uncle Yun, the pending clerk of "Illegal Party | Changping Shop"~ The article is not very long now, but there are many small details. Most of them are my personal opinion, and I hope they can have a good effect. The first thing mentioned is at the beginning of the article. Here I would like to ask a question about the basis of the article, called crested head, pig belly and leopard tail. To put it simply, the beginning should be as beautiful as a crest, the main body should be as substantial as a pig's belly, and the end should be as powerful as a leopard's tail. The beginning of the article is obviously a pity. The first paragraph could be expanded upon to describe the background of the era or a detailed location, but the second paragraph immediately tells the story of the heroine who traveled through time and became the daughter of a bandit leader. The reader didn't even understand what kind of person the heroine was, so he immediately told the reader that the heroine had traveled through time and became a bandit girl~ ← The structure of the article here is quite confusing, so please pay more attention. A good beginning can make readers want to read, so when you finish writing, you should go back and look at your opening sentence, read it yourself, and feel the context. Not every reader has a God's perspective. If you look at your novel from a reader's perspective, you will discover more. When I was flipping through the article, I found a comment below, which simply refers to the fact that the heroine did not appear in the fourth chapter and there were many side characters. Taking this as a starting point, I personally think that although the funny scenes in the side plot are important, they do not necessarily need to be a whole chapter. It's not just that this branch line in the article is too long, but that this chapter is not too closely related to the main line, and I personally think it can be omitted appropriately. Sometimes it seems a bit unreasonable to pursue humor but abandon the structure of the article. So I would like to remind you not to make the branch line too long. If it is too long, it will affect the reading experience. Of course, these funny plots must be used appropriately. If an article is not funny at all and is all drama, unless there is a very good plot, as far as I know personally, the number of people who read it will be much less than other articles. This is not an established fact, it's just that much of fast food literature is like this. At least the author's writing style is very good, and the funny plot is very reasonable, but occasionally I feel that I need to pay attention to those overly long subplots. As far as the overall outline of the article is concerned, generally speaking, the supporting role should not have more roles than the protagonist, otherwise the supporting role may be suspected of stealing the protagonist's role w When it comes to supporting roles, naturally we have to talk about the protagonist. The heroine has a setting called Ten Lifetime Travel. In the previous time-travel process, the old man started to travel with a very noble status. Although his age also became smaller during the time-travel, his identity also gradually became smaller, so that in the end he became the daughter of a bandit. I believe that similar ten-life settings are certainly not uncommon in the entire LJJ, but I have rarely seen this kind of decreasing status and age. So the settings are still very innovative, although based on my current experience, I personally feel that these settings have no effect at all. According to the plot, this setting of the tenth life should be of great use in the future, but now it is just mentioned at the beginning. In order to prevent readers from forgetting later, I thought it would be good to mention it from time to time. Then the characterization of the heroine is a big highlight of the article. Both the tenth life setting and the previously mentioned scene between the heroine and the butcher are both very good, and the former highlights them. As for the personal shaping of the heroine, it is actually the so-called IQ issue. Because judging from the experience of the character in the article, she should have experienced a lot, so she shouldn't be deceived so easily. Of course, I believe the male protagonist's IQ is too high! At the same time, through the examples in the article (that is, the butcher), readers can also see that this girl has the same attributes as most time-traveling girls: very smart, but a bit naive, and occasionally stupid, so she can be regarded as a very satisfactory heroine. As for the heroine, she is actually very well portrayed, but there is one group that I think the author is obviously biased towards. That's the supporting characters. It is a fact that good supporting characters can greatly improve the readability of the article, and this article has a lot of supporting characters, some even more than the protagonist. Because both the bandits and the villains are portrayed very well, but after a comparison, I found that the supporting characters are clearly comparable to the heroine. Sometimes I even feel that the heroine's appearance is a bit redundant, because the supporting characters are too upright. Yes, I mean the one dressed like a flower. I was so impressed! Ahem again, sorry for getting excited, let's change the topic. The male protagonist... Well, the male protagonist is well portrayed. At least I can roughly imagine the image of an "elegant" scholar full of trouble. Among them, the sentence that made me feel the most joyful was the sentence "She made me strong". It was a stroke of genius, which instantly enhanced the laugh point of the work. At the same time, it also made the heroine lose her face, so she just happened to take her home. Sure enough, you have to be bolder when chasing girls... Ahem. And judging from the current plot, I think the image of the male protagonist is very orthodox, strict and upright but full of black ink. This kind of male protagonist is cute to many people, believe me! Ahem, I've said so much and it's all scattered, so let's summarize it. From a personal point of view, the author's writing style is very good and the tension is just right. It can be seen that he is not a newbie. But it happens to be the writing style. In many details and arrangements, only the writing style supports your structure. As a result, although the article is readable, the overall structure is deviated. Moreover, the description and characterization of the characters also require a lot of attention. In addition, it is also very important to unify the person. Sometimes it is the third person and sometimes it is the first person. This is called having a God's perspective. Because most first-person novels have a narrow reading range, and the structure of this article is a bit regrettable, the impression score is very important. Well, I have been talking about some details. In fact, I personally think the story as a whole is quite good. At least as far as the existing plot is concerned, it is still worth looking forward to. Oh, by the way, although it is said that you can just comment on the article, I still have a word of advice: there are too many spaces in the copy, and the layout looks a bit awkward, and the font color and size also need to be adjusted. Ah, it's just a suggestion, don't take it too seriously. In addition, if you come to the store again next time, please remember to notify us if there is a name change. I'm writing "Illegal Party | Changping Pu" Uncle Yun, the author, please remember to come and get the order~

Forgot to scatter flowers, I made a mistake! ! ! ! !

Leave note: I dropped 4 items today, and I couldn't help but feel sorry for myself, so I'm asking for a day off to revise my article. Please forgive me! We will update normally tomorrow, please wait! Mwah!

I revised the article today, from Chapter 2 to Chapter 8. I deleted a lot of plots and also adjusted some plots.