Chronicles of a Shadow Guard

I've always wanted to write a story about a shadow guard. I'm used to seeing shadow guards risk life and limb for their masters, so I want to write about one who just wants to coast through life, hoping for a quiet, uneventful existence, but who keeps getting dragged into trouble. I'm a loving mom-author, so this will be lighthearted, with no angst. If it ends up with a bad ending, I'll bow down and beg forgiveness. My name is Xiao Shisan, and I'm a shadow guard employed by Qixia Manor. This martial world is full of bromance and melodrama. I have to develop titanium-alloy eyes just to make sure I don't get blinded. I've always wanted a girl, but Heaven gave me a guy instead. Well, fine. I'm a calm person, but if I could, I'd like to be the one on top. But... What's wrong with this world? I can feel its malice toward me, QAQ