The Prince of Tennis: A Fish Crying in the Water

The original Tieba author whose ID is Angelの came to report. Well, when I saw the pirated article, I still got a little inexplicable excitement from 2013. Are you my crazy fan? Thanks. In addition, I am also very happy to see the long comments. To check if it is me, please post @Angelの, I, that is, I will answer the question for you. I have nothing to say in the past two years, just thank you, my crazy fan. I love you so much.

Are you surprised when you see me now? I have not forgotten your long comment. Applause~ [ Actually, I am really gentle, but my gentleness is tinged with a little caution, and the caution is coupled with a character framework that cannot be violated. After all these factors are in place, I also add the poisonous tongue brought out in my complaints! Phew, do you think I'm too verbose = = When I first read this article, you surprised me. It's hard to imagine that you can write to this level at your current age. I'm talking about the choice of words and sentences. The writing is pretty good, keep it up. Let's take a look at the setting and direction of this article. Well, let's put it this way, your writing style is fresh and fresh like mine. It's just that I'm better at grasping the writing style, but your fresh style seems very dead. This deadness refers to the silence and loneliness in your writing. This article is too literary. Maybe this is the style you want to express to the readers. However, if the literary grasp is not good, it will make people feel that the preface does not match the follow-up. I have read this kind of article before. There are a lot of literary words in the front, but they have no connection with the rest of the article. In fact, you have done a good job in this aspect. The male protagonist of this article is Yukimura, but he doesn't have many roles, and his main character is not particularly obvious. I don't know how you understand Yukimura, but I have always felt that his personality is difficult to grasp. For example, there is a sharp contrast between the aura when standing on the court and the softness after taking off the sweatband. For example, he can make harmless little jokes with his teammates, but in front of him It will show his rejection and alienation towards other people. Not only him, but everyone in the Rikkai Tennis Club is very exclusive. In other words, they are very proud and can use such pride to look down on others. I hope you can describe this aspect. I don't know why you obviously want to write about Chi's innocence, but I can only see his stupidity, and his awkward and arrogant character is gone. Think about it, if the heroine is a very perverted sister who wants to take advantage of her younger brother, a boy like Chiya will definitely turn red in the face. Here are examples: [Idiot sister! I am no longer a child! ] Kirihara Akaya was tangled in her black kelp hair. She looked at the woman with a bright smile and almost opened her red eyes. My sister is so mean. I wonder if he hates having his head rubbed! Then the heroine will become more frustrated and braver, and rush towards her with a lewd smile: [Akaiya, what are you talking about? In my eyes, you are just a little brat, don't be shy, give your sister a smile~] So Chi also struggled for a while. I think this form looks more comfortable. After all, Kirihara is in the third year of high school and is already in her twenties. No matter how innocent she is, she will not act like a child who has not grown up. Speaking of the loving relationship between the heroine and her dear brother Kelp, the writing here is very pleasant and relaxed, but then it turns into a serious drama, and the literary style comes again... It's like wanting to write a serious drama but couldn't help but write about it in a relaxed way when encountering a comical character like Kelp. When facing an ex-boyfriend, he switched back to his literary talents to show his unforgettable feelings about the past relationship. I don't know what it feels like to like someone. I usually feel that feelings come and go quickly, but I think that Tezuka Kunizan went to Germany that year and came to Kanagawa when the heroine was in her first year of college. The two met again. It was more than four years apart. The heroine should have let go of the relationship that ended in vain, and since then I think her usual behavior is quite calm, and she probably won't burst into tears. The only emotion she can have now is probably the nostalgia of the past and the memories of a lifetime ago. Writing this way will be more acceptable, because that is what happened in the past, there is no need to think about it, and starting a new love is the right way [thumbs up] The character of the heroine is not well grasped. Her heart always shows melancholy and sadness, and she is very uneasy because she feels very lonely and alone when her classmates gather in groups to chat in twos and threes. In my understanding, only by letting go and actively talking to others can she have more friends. This also shows her insecurity, because she is afraid to show her heart to others because she has been hurt in the past. There is also the part about Fuji. I think it's not that Fuji doesn't want to smile but just forces himself to smile, but that he is used to smiling, just like I always smile lightly when I don't speak. Wherever I go, what impresses others most is that I often smile. I am also used to it. I think we should be the same in this regard. After seeing Fuji's smile, I subconsciously felt that people who are always smiling are shady = = Also, the hug after the play ended made me a little confused. According to Fuji's character, he is very good at hiding and has an unfathomable heart. The heroine also saw it too thoroughly, as if she already knew it. Then Fuji showed his vulnerability in front of her. If I had written it, it would have been more obscure, and it would have given Fuji a little more curiosity and exploration about the heroine, but I would not have been cowardly in showing my feelings in front of others. I don't really like the place where a prince is invited and a bunch of princes are brought out by the way. It's very deliberately rushed, and many people just go through the motions after meeting, and they don't occupy much place or plot in the plot. I really like your writing style, it's very smooth. It reminds me of a novel I read many years ago, which also had this light style. However, you didn't handle it very well in some places. I'll have to keep working hard in the future. *Jiuge Changpingpu&Ashan