Scum Gong's Diary

"A good breakup is the most beautiful love confession in the world." "You've got it backward. It's a good breakup followed by a good reunion." Warnings: Switching roles, first-person narration, and both leads have their flaws. The title has a double meaning: scum seme / diary, and scum / seme diary. It took seven years to finish writing, so the wording in the first few chapters is dated. Don't sweat the details. A silly little sweet story is being saved up in my drafts. See my profile: "The Villain in My Book Ran Out to Demand an Update [Transmigration into a Book]." Xiao Shou went into the danmei business and wrote a novel, creating a "perfect" villain named Long Batian. Long Batian knows everything and can do anything! Long Batian is seductive, arrogant, and peerlessly charming! Long Batian can service nine men in one night and still be rock hard! The villain was too powerful, making it too hard to move the plot forward. Xiao Shou was stuck so badly he was practically dying. Just then, a man fell from the sky. Xiao Shou: Holy crap, who are you? Man: Long Batian. Xiao Shou: How did you get out here?! Long Batian: Because I know everything and can do anything. Xiao Shou: ...May I ask what you want? Long Batian, expressionless: I'm here to demand an update. Xiao Shou: . Bonus Scene 1: Long Batian: I have a problem with my character setup. Xiao Shou: Sir, let's talk this out. Put the knife away. I'll change it, okay? Long Batian: Remove the part about servicing nine men in one night. What kind of person does that? Xiao Shou: Sure, sure. I'll delete the part about servicing nine men in one night and still being rock hard. Long Batian: ...Leave the rock-hard part in. Xiao Shou: ? Bonus Scene 2: Xiao Shou got stuck again. Long Batian: What can't you write this time? Xiao Shou, covering his face: Um, the sex scene. Long Batian: ... Long Batian: Come here. I'll teach you. Xiao Shou: Wow! Thank you, sir! Wait, you said you'd teach me to write it. Why are you pulling off my clothes?? Theme: