Me Is No Frog, Me Is Named Fran

"Why do you have to make me wear this frog hat? It's so ugly." "Because... of course you have to wear this frog hat to take Mammon's place!" "So you really are that obsessed with Senior Mammon. Master was right. You two really have something going on." "I'm going to kill you, frog! ###" "Ah, me is so scared. The stupid prince says he's going to kill me." "Hee hee hee hee--" "Stupid prince, don't just throw things around. Me is hurt... by this stuff..." "Hey, you stinking frog, don't just throw my weapons around, you bastard..." "Help! There's a murderer!" "Aho, stop shouting nonsense. We're still on a mission. What are you trying to do?!" "Me just doesn't want you to commit the crime of murder, that's all." "..." Twitch, twitch. You want to know what kind of story this is? I'm not going to tell you it's about a frog getting dragged off by a fake prince. Is it literary? Sure, at your great-uncle's house. Is it totally out there? I can tell you responsibly: bring at least 20 Rambo movies. Is there snark? Do you think there wouldn't be with Fran around? Actually, this is just a ridiculous, crack-filled fantasy from beginning to end. Fran: Author, if you keep rambling, me won't let you write me into your story anymore. Some Good-for-Nothing: Can you believe characters are threatening authors these days? What a disgrace, what a disgrace~ Fallen Prince: Hee hee--[Whoosh~] Some Good-for-Nothing gets stabbed. Some Good-for-Nothing dies. So, Fallen Prince, if you stab me again, I won't let you and the frog have your little affair, damn it! 2786: Tsunayoshi Sawada meets the pervy Kagura. Fake 2727, Kuroko BG. Work in progress.