The Jade Mountain Crumbles

In other words, the most important thing about ancient style writing is the ancient style of writing, the ancient artistic conception, and the ancient images presented. But you don't have to be too deliberate in stringing together some words and phrases. The gorgeous rhetoric may even make a sentence lose its original meaning, or simply make it dizzy, difficult to pronounce, and difficult to read. However, if you write more and write more smoothly, you should be able to improve naturally. Another point is that since you are ancient, you can just go on like this, but why is there still something like "petrification"? ><Feeling a bit broken.

Article title: "Decay of Jade Mountain" Article address: □//www. Jjwxc. Net/onebook. Php? Novelid=1532051 Author name: Zhier Article type (originality and orientation): Ancient Chinese proverbs, martial arts, alternate history Word count (please specify when finished): nearly 40,000, currently being serialized Article style: Drama Whether it is a contracted author: No Introduction to the article (optional): In the Cangwu Dynasty, there was a prophecy that the person who obtained the jade treasure could ascend to the throne and become the king. Year after year, I don't know which successor started, the abdication system became hereditary, and collecting jade pendants to find the jade treasure became the assessment method for the superior to select the heir apparent. The rivers and lakes are also eyeing Yu Zang. Killings and conspiracies, the Yuzang soaked in blood mist, is still waiting somewhere for the next person to discover it. The temples are high, the rivers and lakes are far away, the scenes flow, the first encounter in Luo City, the Cangzhou Sword Club, the exploration of the Wuyou Valley... She transformed from a young lady from a noble family to a swordsman who defeated the first sect leader. They gathered with the same goal but different purposes. On the way to find the jade treasure, they went from singing wantonly to the roar of the wind and the undercurrent of emotions. Where to go? Comment requirements: (Key points, questions, etc. Are optional): Newcomer, vacuum writing, don't show mercy, focus on writing style, character creation and plot development, expression ability, whether it is too slow, and watchability. Thank you all shop assistants [Wedge] This is Nono (Ah Chi), a newcomer here. Please give me some advice. Please raise any issues due to lack of experience or inappropriate wording. Maybe some of Nuonuo's (Ah Chi's) views are too one-sided and extreme, or his thinking is short-sighted and subjective, and does not conform to your ideas. Please forgive me. Suggestions are also welcome. I'm really sorry that the review has been delayed for so long due to some subjective or objective reasons. According to the author's request and my preference for this article (Dear, I have recommended your article), the evaluation is divided into multiple parts. But because I really love this article, if the words below are too extreme, you can contact the store manager privately or click on my column to view the contact information. Of course, pure hookup can also be done (spit). [Part One]Writing style and expressive ability The first chapter of the article is a failure. Why? You named a tragic girl at the beginning. Please don't do this. Even if the plot is reversed, most readers will be lost. Fortunately, I have a habit of skipping chapters that I don't like. The first chapter was completely unnecessary in my opinion. Because even if it is just a wedge, it does not play any role in guiding the plot. On the contrary, it feels like a premature spoiler, which makes me always on tenterhooks while reading the story. I feel like the male protagonist has appeared and he will die if I don't do it right. How could this be possible? If it's just me who thinks this way, then I'm sorry. In terms of writing style, the biggest problem for me after reading this article is that the description of some details is ambiguous. There is a feeling of foreshadowing in some sentences, but I don't think it is necessary, because I won't have any impression after reading it, as long as time passes. [At this time, the visitor started to speak, "Your Majesty, you are very welcome. Your Majesty, please go out to greet me personally." Prince Rui smiled and said nothing, and invited the group to enter the mansion... When we met for the first time, no one knew about it except the moon in the sky. The first time I watched it, I really didn't notice their first meeting. I only brought it up when I saw it when I was rewatching it and wanted to focus on punctuation. This kind of foreshadowing is not necessary so it is not necessary. The necessary foreshadowing is the details of the development of every matter. For example, when writing about a dead person, when writing the murderer's alibi, there should be a problem with writing a lot of casual details before that, but when reading it, the reaction will be reasonable, until someone discovers that the person is dead. Only when the reader wants to go to the front to find evidence will it be justified. And the punctuation mark of "Kiss You" makes me feel sick to my stomach every time I see it. [Running to the city gate in one breath, she stopped to take a rest. She saw that the sky was turning white, and she had been thinking about it for two hours. It's time for Green Luo to wake up, her father will be furious, and my little sister...] [Take a deep breath of the chilly morning air and exhale the turbidity in your chest. She climbed up the tower, took one last look at the sleeping Chang'an, then flew down and walked along the road outside the city. There is only a faint trace of the moon left in the sky...] [There is only peace in my heart, sister, fly like you said, and be Shu Luoyu instead of the eldest daughter of the Minister of War...] The ellipses didn't offend you. Please use ellipses with caution, author girl. Sometimes, using an ellipsis in the middle can make the tone more distinct. But sentence breaking with exclamation points and commas is also important. Long sentences can sometimes read strangely. [There is only peace in my heart, sister, just fly like you said! Be Shu Luoyu, not... The eldest daughter of the Minister of War. But sometimes, you need to know where the comma or period appears. Otherwise it will feel inexplicable. [Running to the city gate in one breath, she stopped to rest for a while. She saw that the horizon had turned white. She had been thinking for two hours. It was time for Luo Luo to wake up. Her father would be furious [when he found out]. My little sister... [Alas. ]] I made some modifications so that the author can compare the tone. This is the sentence immediately following the above, [[She] took a deep breath of the chilly early morning air and exhaled the turbidity in her chest. [ ] As she climbed up the tower, [she] took one last look at the sleeping Chang'an, then flew down and walked along the road outside the city. There is only... A faint trace of the moon left in the horizon. Remember that if you change paragraphs or something, the subject must appear first. My habit is to put the ellipses at the beginning or in the middle of the sentence. Because the format will look neater, and sometimes the tone will be just right. [At this time, the visitor started to speak, "Prince Rui, you're very polite. If you're interested, Prince Rui will go out to greet you personally." Prince Rui smiled and said nothing, and invited the group to enter the house. There is absolutely no need to use ellipses here. Please consider the punctuation marks, please. The placement of commas and periods is really important. Can affect readers' emotions sometimes. At the beginning, I didn't see so many problems with punctuation marks. Now that I have discovered them, I will raise these first. I initially only noticed the recurring problem of ellipses at the end of sentences. Punctuation is also an expression. Especially now. I think the main problem is that I didn't pay attention when writing the article. I asked the author to read it through several times after she finished writing. Reduce error rates. Most importantly, punctuation has as much influence on readers as words. To be honest, in terms of writing style, this is not bad. I personally don't think there's anything good to comment on. Because every article, modern and ancient writing style is different. Just stick to your own. Just skip it. After all, this can only be practiced slowly by oneself, and it has something to do with personal experience, reading preference, author, etc. Expression ability, I think there is really no problem with the girl's expression ability. However, please pay attention to some descriptive details. [Seeing the figure of the visitor with light smoke like the moon] I specifically googled the word "light smoke like the moon" here, and it didn't exist. There are many such specious words in the author's girl's article, but although it seems good at first glance, if you glance over it in a hurry, you will feel that the author has literary talent. When you think about it carefully, you will feel that it is inexplicable. Light smoke and Ruyue have nothing to do with each other. According to the results of Google, most of the sentences are composed of […Light smoke…,…Ruyue…] They describe different things. And if these two words are true, it is quite strange. How can the figure be as light as the moon? There are such descriptive words in many places, so I won't list them one by one. Please pay attention to them when the author is editing the article. [Seeing this scene, Liuyue gave a comforting smile, looked at the door in front of her, took a deep breath and stepped into the forbidden area first. I have read this several times, and after adding the previous sentences, it finally makes sense, but the word "take the lead" is used in the wrong place. Only Liuyue wanted to enter the sect leader's room, so there was no need to use the word "take the lead". [He slowly retracts his jade-glowing fingers and holds them behind his back] Someone has already pointed out the [jade light] here, but I think the author wants to describe it as moonlight. The moonlight is like water, which is indeed beautiful, but please note the adjectives, the jade light is really inexplicable. But I think it's more likely a typo error. [Looking worriedly at the glorious but somewhat lonely silhouette in front of him, the sect master is becoming more and more dull.] How can you see the [glorious] profile here? My dear, this kind of adjective is more appropriate to describe his behavior or what he has done. Just looking at a profile, you can't see [brilliant], but loneliness can be seen from the description of the environment in the previous article. In addition, there are punctuation errors here. Please correct it yourself and ignore it. The biggest problem in expressive ability is the diction. It does not mean that the girl's diction is gorgeous, but that there is a small problem with the wording. You may not notice it when you are writing the article, but you can clearly see it when you look back. There are many places that need to be changed in the whole article. Since there are many commentators who have done a detailed study, I will not mention them. But the author does one thing well. The combination of environment and character description does not make people feel abrupt when reading, but makes people feel just right. If I can do this without realizing it, I think the girl has a great future. Very nice. Please continue to carry it forward, the ancient charm of environmental description is indeed rare. [Part Two]Character creation Regarding the creation of the characters, to be honest, in my opinion it's pretty good. It's a pity that at the beginning, the image of everyone when they appeared, and later in the development of the plot, the brothers and sisters are consistent, especially when the real incident has not been experienced yet. Starting from the heroine, it's already a bit broken. Why, refuse marriage. From this, we can see that she is immature and does not think properly. She feels that as long as she leaves, she will not be held accountable. It can be seen that she is still a teenager at heart. It cannot be said to be selfish. [The woman in front of me spoke words of concern but had a cold face] It can be seen that the heroine is a quirky and arrogant girl. Various descriptions in the following articles can reveal the girl's youthful nature. However, in the final analysis, she grew up in the daughter's home. Even though she knows martial arts and other things, she does not know many things in the world. But I don't think a girl can go to a brothel so freely. She is not just a daughter of the world, at least she still has the disdain that some officials' daughters have for women in brothels. The author did not show this, but wrote that she and Youge went to the brothel so naturally. It feels weird. Even though she has great martial arts skills and appears as a clue character later on because she has a Jianghu master, I don't think anyone will say good things about the brothel. Most people, even if they are Jianghu children, will know that it is not a good place when they first hear about the brothel, and their daughter's family will not just go there like this. Moreover, her daughter's identity was clearly discovered when she was disguised as a man. Could it be that she was not aware of it at all, and her senior brother did not remind her. Since the two of them are friends, even though she doesn't understand anything, she might give some advice. This is beyond my comprehension. The image of the sect leader collapsed in the later period. I don't believe him if he is overconfident by letting the heroine enter his room easily. After experiencing the traitor incident, is he really not wary at all? It's impossible. Will he really trust his people that much? Totally impossible. There is a feeling that the author specially gave the heroine a golden finger here. [Part Three]Plot development The author also mentioned whether it is slow to warm up. I think it is better to mention it here together. It's not that it's slow to warm up, but it just feels like it doesn't fit in well with the front and back. It would be strange if the prince in the previous article invited those people into the palace just to serve the purpose of meeting the male protagonist and the female protagonist. However, as a clue, no relevant information was mentioned in the later stage, which made it feel cumbersome. (Maybe it was mentioned, I didn't find it, I can point it out.) The coherence of many plots is pretty good. It just needs the author to write more about the characters, such as the first two of the Four Young Masters. Their images are still vague. Especially my feeling after reading the entire article. But it can be seen that they are extremely important figures to this article. Therefore, the author, please pay attention to the characterization of the characters, which will make the development of the plot of the article more reasonable and objective. The biggest problem in the plot is probably the expression at the beginning. It is said that everything is difficult at the beginning. The obvious changes in the heroine's personality when she was in the Ministry of War Minister's Mansion and her personality outside the mansion may be related to the environment, but the character and plot inside the mansion still need to be modified. Because the front and back cannot be connected. The description of the palace seems too brief, perhaps because the author wants to get to the point as quickly as possible. I don't think that a father who can become the Minister of War would be so naive and be deceived by his daughter so easily and easily. After all, he knew his daughter well, so he should spend more time describing his father, otherwise it would be a bit inexplicable for him to agree to his second daughter's statement so easily. You should lay the groundwork for your father's plans. It may be linked to the plot later, but even if it is just a foreshadowing, enough background is needed to express the characters more vividly. [Extra Part] Subjective (including observability issues) After reading the article roughly, the writing is smooth, and the plot and background can be seen from just 40,000 to 50,000 words, and the vastness of the macro world can be seen. As far as I am concerned, it is indeed a good article. Without going into detail, the impression I got after reading it for the first time was "good", that's the only word. The characters compete to appear, but they do not lose their elegance, and the images are quite distinct, but the superficial description and the vague contrast in the dark suddenly make the whole article feel alive. I have to say, it's well worth watching. But as a newcomer, I did make a lot of mistakes when writing about ancient martial arts. When writing articles, especially articles related to ancient customs, the author must carefully consider her words. Because many words have their own unique charm. Don't be like Vivibear, who created many false words and misled people. (Please check this on Baidu yourself. I didn't hack her. This was picked out by netizens) Above, please keep up the good work. [After the Commentary] Thoughts on receiving orders After reading the article, I read the long reviews that the author girl asked for in other stores. At that time, I didn't know that I was asking for a long review, but it also made me wonder for the first time why there is such a poorly written long review (it seems that I myself have exceeded the standard even more embarrassing). Many words are nonsense. Why. I have put the previous copywriting on the list so that the author can compare it. In my opinion, this article is not an article about love as the main theme. It focuses more on the portrayal of the changes in the character's personality and their growth. It has the flavor of a hot-blooded shounen comic where teenagers embark on a journey of never looking back (...). From the beginning, except for the first chapter that I didn't like, it was indeed refreshing to read and reflect on. Of course, the plot begins after the heroine escapes. Apart from the messy questions I raised, it seems to me that the author is a little sloppy in using words to build a worldview simply because she lacks training, lacks the strength to handle words, and is a novice. Many of the detailed issues that have been pointed out are due to this reason. The story line of the author girl is very long, I can tell from the original copywriting. I decided to take this order precisely because of this copywriting. After replacing the copywriting, I only have one sentence, which is really tasteless. It was originally a magnificent story of a boy's growth, but after changing the text, it became a love story of a girl who escaped from marriage. This routine has been badly written. Although some people may find it cute at first glance, you can easily drag the article down. From martial arts to romance. I don't mean that the grade of romance is lower than that of martial arts, but the original concept of the author's article can be placed in the martial arts section, but the changed copywriting has to be placed in the romance section. There is a feeling that it has changed from a majestic and majestic one to a small one. Copywriting sometimes limits the way you write, even if it's not your ideas. In other words, you have moved from an unpopular genre to an ancient romance novel that follows the trend, but unfortunately what I want to tell you is that you have lost your own advantages in this way. Of course, if the author just wants to see a piece of data, that's it. If you want to stand out, she should keep her original style. I don't think it's easy for you to have your own style from the beginning. It's always difficult for a girl to write a great article, and I don't want you to do the same. Trapped tightly by the word romance. Maybe some people will criticize it, but it is undeniable that it was because of your original copywriting that I chose not to give up when I saw the first chapter that I didn't like. [Final]Summary Hey, hey, I saw no mercy, so I really showed no mercy. I still brought up the issue of grade, even though the store manager warned me to stop it. The main thing is, love is deep and responsibility is deep, author girl, I really want to flirt with you and knock you down (hey). I still have to repeat that I am very optimistic about the development of the author girl and the development of this article. I really like it so I am merciless. If you are dissatisfied, of course you can complain to me alone. It doesn't matter, I can bear it. There is nothing wrong with it for the girl you love (text by...). But please don't ask anyone other than the author to interfere, otherwise my status as a general attacker will not be exaggerated. The writing style is average, below average. In some places the words don't convey the meaning. Needs training. There are many details and punctuation issues that will have a great impact when reading the text, as mentioned above. The plot is smooth and good. Coherent and smooth, in short, you can read it in one go. The characters are mediocre and above average. The main reason is that the number of words is not enough or the description of details is not enough. Although the characters are there, they are quite vivid, but the three-dimensionality is not strong enough and the appeal is not strong enough. It should be related to the plot development issue. The idea is great, and it's excellent. To be honest, there are really not many people who write about words like passion, arena, adventure, and partners, so most people don't focus on the main line and go to write about love. However, the author cleverly combines plot and suspense, and the foreshadowing is sufficient, so it is not too abrupt to read. Being able to do this as a newcomer is pretty good. The update speed, because updates have been stopped recently, so judging from the update time mentioned above, it should be pretty good. However, due to the issue of the update being stopped, I have to give it only average. To sum up, this article should be rated as good/above average. Probably somewhere in between. Mainly because the concept is so brilliant. At a time when there are so many romance articles, articles with adventure and suspense as the main line are enough to make people shine. The point is that I really love the original copywriting (hey). The parts that need to be modified have been mentioned above. The recommended study object is "The Boy from Shushan". In terms of conception, you don't need to study too much, you just need to perfect it, or think about some technical issues. The reason for recommendation is emotion. To be honest, there are not many articles about the description of emotions between partners that can really make people see it. "The Boy from Shushan" can be regarded as a leader from a female perspective. Although one is a cultivator and the other is a martial artist. Above. Rolling] Hey, hey, hey, the author girl begs for hooking up, teasing, and knocking down~ (You are enough) Nono (Ah Chi) [Produced by Delusion Syndrome]

1Pay attention to punctuation marks. Don't underestimate this matter, it will affect the reader's interest. 2The author seems to like to use commas, which makes people feel like there is no chance to breathe when reading. It is recommended to combine long and short sentences so that they are coordinated and comfortable to read. 3Writing is a lonely and happy thing. Don't be anxious, take your time, and when you settle down, your writing will also settle down and relax. There will be a pleasant and soothing atmosphere between the lines. It's good to have a certain amount of relaxation. Writing quickly does not necessarily mean that everything is the best. [4] Some of the words in the novel are too deliberate. Writing tests test your writing skills. There is no need to deliberately write, which makes it difficult to read. For example, [He slowly retracted his jade-glowing fingers and held them behind his back] At first glance, it seemed a little strange. It meant that his fingers were as beautiful as jade, but what is jade-glow? It's a bit tiring to put the words together. [The sparse forest swept back, the carved beams and painted pillars of the three-story sailboat carried the moonlight through the water mirror and headed towards the capital. The boatman's loud whistle came from the distance, Mengyuan Wuye Village...] I won't list them one by one later. [5] The plot jumps a bit fast. Some plots can be expanded and written. At the turning point, some explanations of the whereabouts of plot characters can be made. Most of the articles just describe the scenery and then move to the next plot. [6] The characters are slightly weak, and the men who appear do not have very obvious distinguishing characteristics. The author can use pen and ink to describe the scenery, or he can use more pen and ink to describe the appearance of the protagonist. Most of the time in the article, there is only pure dialogue. When writing the dialogue, he can add their demeanor, actions, and the tone and expression of their speech at that time. [7] Overall, the plot is relatively bland and has no attractive highlights. Later on, when more and more characters appear, it looks a bit chaotic, and sometimes I can't react properly. [8] The most annoying thing is that "Qing Yue" is a man. I (this is the clerk Qiao) have a book that I am writing. The female supporting character is called "Qing Yue", and she is bursting into tears. 9Since you are writing an imaginary article, don't bring in things like Kunlun and Kongtong, which will appear nondescript. Just keep it imaginary. To put it bluntly, why don't you just write about the Five Mountains Sword Sect? It would be much easier. [10] What is this "Fengqizong"? At first glance, I thought it was the Xuanxin Zongzong in "A Chinese Ghost Story". There is also a name that accidentally makes readers think it is a person's name, causing unnecessary misunderstandings. The name is so different. 11Mu Zhuoyou, he should be a very important character even if he is not the male protagonist. Even the description of his appearance is so stingy. Is it because of the need for mystery or because the writing is not good enough? 12If Mu Zhuoyou gives an order, can't he order one paragraph at a time? It doesn't matter if they are stacked together and it takes a lot of effort to read. It doesn't reflect the sharpness and decisiveness when giving orders. Sometimes the quality of the writing has a lot to do with the layout. 13When Liuyue went to convey Mu Zhuoyou's order, couldn't he describe a little bit about the situation and environment of everyone in the hall? Such a brief introduction will make me feel that the Fengqizong is just a small gang, inconspicuous and classless. The description here is much more useful and does not seem empty than the previous article that exaggerated the glory of the Fengqizong through the mouths of Jianghu people. 14Should I say that the author is smart or stupid? The description of the characters is replaced by something Shu Ying embroidered. Although it's okay from the side, I still find it weird. 15The following is a personal emotion (still a certain Qiao). I really can't stand the character Shu Ying. She makes me look like Sister Lin. Isn't it just that I broke up with my sister on bad terms and shed tears? I also write articles, and I know how to shape a person from all angles. It cannot be based on preference, but must be based on the full text, but I still really can't stand Shu Ying. 16Is the aging face of a generation of generals no longer young? There is a linguistic problem, senility itself describes an old person, certainly not young, and it is repetitive and cumbersome. [17] I finally saw the portrait description of Mu Zhuoyou. Although it was short, I was still moved. This description was too late and should have been done when the character appeared. [18] Forgive me, in my heart (a certain Qiao still lingers...) The only person named Shu in Cang Yue's pen is "Shu Jingrong" who is perfect. If you use the surname "Shu", I will unconsciously associate it with Shu Jingrong. Hehe. 19Zi Zimo opened his mouth to say "Brother Shu" and closed his mouth "Brother Shu". It was really unbearable, and Zi Mo's character level plummeted. Generally, high-class people like Zi Zimo use the word "gongzi" instead of brothers. Only those who are laughing in the world will call them brothers. Details matter. [20] I have been told that the plot jumps too fast. You are a better author than me (a certain Qiao is reborn). Although it is the beginning, one or two plots are allowed to pop up in a haphazard way to arouse the readers' interest and also serve as foreshadowing. However, there are too many plots like yours, and readers who read it for the first time will be caught off guard. I'm a little confused myself. 21There are too many typos, first a confused "brother cold", and then Ye Youge said "junior sister", which is a bit overwhelming. 22Chapter 4: Chuiyang Zimo, is it related to the content of Chapter 4? Don't make something completely irrelevant just to pursue a sense of literature and art. The image of willow means farewell because of its homophony of "liu", and that "Zi Mo" first of all reminds me of "Zi Mo", one of the four guardians of Tingxue Tower in Cang Yue's works. Furthermore, "The flowers on the road are blooming, you can return home slowly." "This is what most people will think of after seeing "Mo". You don't need to elaborate on this meaning. If these two images are used here, your high school Chinese teacher will probably cry. 23Although it is for the needs of the characters and plot, it is still unbearable for a man, or a man from ancient times, to wear pink, and the name can be either male or female. If this is the desired effect, then it can be considered a success. [24] [Black clouds rolled over the mountains without covering the mountains, and white raindrops jumped into the boat.] This is probably a Tang poetry. Can you not start the poem with something similar to Tang poetry and Song lyrics after a few paragraphs? Maybe the author himself didn't realize it, but I still think it's weird and too deliberate. 25It is true that opposites attract each other. I have just read Chapter 6 and there are already so many men appearing that I can't remember them all. Every male appearance is not as simple as Zi Mo. Each scene is bigger and higher-grade than the last. I have begun to doubt who your male protagonist is. [26] Since it is a martial arts novel, the descriptions and lyrical aspects of martial arts and martial arts scenes are not grand enough, and even feel a bit hollow and powerless. If you can't write it realistically, you can write it fictitiously. For practical writing of martial arts, I suggest you learn from Chu Xidao's "Song of Tomorrow: Song of Mountains and Rivers." 27The dialogue is really hard to read, and I strongly urge you to write it in one sentence. Clean and crisp. 28Since the "fourth young master" has been mentioned, why not explain it according to Ye Youge's words? This is the beginning of the chapter. If we don't explain it now, do we have to hide it for the New Year? 29After reading Chapter 7, I no longer want to express any opinions on this author's chapter title. There is no objection. 30This gap has lost all traces of Youge, and I can't even read this sentence smoothly. The writing fails to express its meaning. [31] I still have the same opinion. You can't describe too much about the environment. If you can't write well, don't publish it. I can't stand it anymore. Writing about martial arts is about grandeur. I suggest you read Qing Lingyue's "Lanyin·Biyue" which describes the residence of Master Lan Qi, Dong Weiming. Although the style is different, I guarantee you will benefit a lot. 32The more Shen Jingruo looks at him, the more he feels like the proud Dongfang Bubai, with goosebumps all over his body. 33Is the writing about Nanmen Market meaningful? The content is similar to what was introduced before about Mu Zhuoyou. Obvious redundancy. It is suggested that the scene should be deleted and the middle-aged man in green robe should be directly written. Sure enough, there are too many men in this article to remember. 34When I read Chapter 10, why can't I see the coherence of the whole article? Why are they all fragments? [35] In Chapter 10, what did Yun Sheng come out to explain to Shu Luoyu in order to explain to the readers the environment they were in? Or someone who explains the stalking? Does it need to take such a long time? Too much. PS: The purpose of this store is sharp and venomous. If you feel that this store is deliberately seeking trouble, delete it and ignore it. By——Fireworks Enchanting Manager Shop [Yun, Xian, Qiao] (This is a mixed review) The following are the words of the store manager [The author should not read that a certain Qiao is the most shameless and ruthless person, in fact, she is the person who appreciates you the most]

After discussion with the store staff, you are welcome to join! The long review has been sent, please go to the shop to receive the review.

This is Ah Chi [Delusion Syndrome (Long Review Shop)], who answered the girl's request for review. I'll probably be able to comment here in the evening [Portland time, USA]. Already read the entire article. Please wait patiently XD

I would like to ask the author, do you sign up to join the shop or is it something else? By——Pyrotechnics Enchanting Manager Shop

Gorgeous is not just words I believe that the girl's literature should be good. There are piles of gorgeous words, none of which are the same. But when too many gorgeous words are combined together, sometimes it seems a bit like showing off literature. First of all, the real focus should be on how smooth the writing is. The girl can try not to use so many gorgeous words. After all, this is an online article, not a paper article. In fact, there is no such exquisite study of these literary backgrounds. Yes, of course, it is good to use some occasionally, but it is not necessary to read the whole article like this. It will make people very tired to read and very boring to read. Maybe the articles that the girl has read before are more biased towards the kind of ancient prose. I mind that she should choose some more famous online articles to read. In fact, those articles by great masters do not have many gorgeous words, but they are so comfortable to read, and they will keep wanting to follow them. Another point is about her formatting problem. Every time I see online articles written by newcomers, they are like paper articles without paragraphs. I can't help but remind her. I wonder if she has ever gone back and looked at her articles online. When you click on a chapter to read, it will feel dense. When readers see this messy layout, they will usually close it directly and not want to continue reading. So I personally think, girl, you should use the space bar to separate lines after a certain number of paragraphs. "Send a message to both of them, don't rush to catch up. Appoint Nan Xi to be in charge of the Lingnan branch and make sure everything is safe before meeting me." "Tell Xiao Yue not to pursue if there is no successful ambush in the Miao border." I copied the above paragraph from the girl's article. The girl could have separated it into small paragraphs instead of connecting them together like this. If connected like this, sometimes readers will seem to think that these words are all together. If they are separated, it will be easier for people to understand the content. Another thing I want to say is that as a newcomer, if you can update every day, you should try your best to update every day. After all, it is difficult for people to discover you as a newcomer. The more words you update every day, the more you can be on the list. Then more readers will notice you. (As a friendly reminder, it is better for the girl to have 3000-4000 words per chapter. That points is the highest, and can climb up the list earlier), regardless of whether the writing is good or not, if there is no reader, it will be difficult for a newcomer to continue writing. I understand the girl's mood very well. After all, the full love will always be hit by the faint numbers. The only thing for a newcomer is to remember to code words all the time. Come on, girl. Another point is about the girl's copy. She can actually compress it a bit. Then the background of this color looks very inconsistent with the girl's picture. Although the words of this color highlight those few words, when the copy is too long, sometimes readers will only see the first one. I won't continue to read the paragraph, haha. Actually, the reader I'm talking about is me. I just can't like copywriting that is too long. Of course, girls can completely ignore this point and stick to your long copywriting. But can you change the color of the background of the word? It's really dazzling. Last but not least, I still want to encourage the girl to continue. As a newcomer, if you finish the first book, no matter whether it is good or bad, you will get certain benefits from it. As someone who has been through it, the girl must believe it~~~, after all, we are all newcomers. ——By Illegal Party Chang Ping Pu Enron

Come to see you, drift over, drift over~

Please change the copywriting. This kind of copywriting appears too much in the romance industry. I usually just ignore it when I see it.

If you want your novel to be popular, I can give you some advice. First, writing style. Never think that a whole chapter of gorgeous words is good writing style. Readers will make their own judgments about writing style. Good is good, bad is bad. Sometimes after reading a whole chapter, the writing seems gorgeous but is actually very vain. It doesn't even make people want to read it. It's boring as hell. As for how to improve your writing skills, there are actually many ways. If you want to have good writing skills, you need to pay a certain price. One of the most down-to-earth ones is reading. Second, plot and creativity. Creativity is a very mysterious thing, but it will be reflected in your plot. Never use a plot that makes readers feel upset. Many third-rate novels nowadays are about the love between men and women, because they are about romance, but can you find new tricks in this love? Can the reader see something else? A storyteller is an author who writes exquisite novels. If an author cannot motivate readers to continue reading, it means that she has no talent. Third, attitude, writing well is one thing, but attitude towards readers is also very important, because this reader is likely to develop into your nc fans in the future (no derogatory meaning here). Having a fixed readership is the fantasy of every author. So the attitude must be good. When you encounter criticism, you should accept it with an open mind, don't look for any reasons or excuses, always review yourself, and always make progress (if you encounter someone who is really kicking the club, don't pay attention to it, just ignore it). In fact, if you want your article to be popular, there are many important factors, such as multi-coded writing, so that your article appears in the eyes of readers. Finally, I wish your articles become more and more popular.