[Douluo Dalu] I Transmigrated into Xiao Wu

Updated weekly 👀 Crazy blurb: (This story is extremely vulgar. Read at your own risk.) Xiao Wu said to Dai Mubai, "Boss Xiao Bai~ It's wrong to try before you buy. You can't treat Xiao Qing like this just because it makes you happy..." Dai Mubai was speechless. "I didn't..." Xiao Wu: "Boss, making excuses is wrong." Xiao Wu said to Oscar, "Second-in-command Xiao Ao, I love sliced grilled sausages. Make some for your big sister to try." Oscar: "..." His balls ached. Xiao Wu said to Ma Hongjun, "Fourth-in-command Fatty, with how much you eat and how often you get laid, shouldn't you have bastards all over the place by now? Is there really not one woman willing to have your child?" Ma Hongjun: "...Third Brother! Drag Xiao Wu away. She's trampling all over my dignity!" Xiao Wu: "Fatty, changing the subject is wrong." Xiao Wu said to Ning Rongrong, "Rongrong, how do Oscar's sausages taste?" (That sounded... way too suggestive, didn't it?) Ning Rongrong: "...Xiao Wu, you..." She was mortified. Xiao Wu said to Zhu Zhuqing, "Qingqing, little sis, you can't spoil a man, so you absolutely have to be on top." Zhu Zhuqing (her face turning as red as an apple): "..." Tang San couldn't take it anymore. He came over and dragged Xiao Wu away. "Who taught you to talk like that?" Xiao Wu: "Brother, it's because you never spend time with me. You don't have to work so hard to earn money, you know. Everyone's getting married without a house or a car these days... Hey, Brother, no!" This is a self-indulgent, fluffy fantasy. Fans of the various Douluo characters, please don't come after me. Bring your own warning sign. It's wall-to-wall melodrama, and some of the characterization may stray from canon...