Liu Qiaoruo barged without warning into Cao Pi's life with a mission to save Emperor Wen of Wei.
To Cao Pi, she was an imposter strategist who was neither alive nor dead, a butterfly with broken wings on the Bronze Sparrow Terrace, and his shadow.
Liu Qiaoruo's presence infuriated him.
Because he was the only one who could see her, and it was infuriating that he was the only one who could see her.
Who was she, really?
On the night he made Guo Nuwang his empress, he lowered his eyes, hiding a trace of indescribable disappointment, then asked Liu Qiaoruo again, "Who are you, really?"
Liu Qiaoruo looked at him with a smile in her eyes. "I'm you."
The night wind stirred, the candle flame flickered. He remembered the night before Zhang Xiu surrendered and then rebelled again. When he had asked her the same question, she had answered, "Just think of me as a shadow of yours."
When Liu Qiaoruo transmigrated, Cao Pi was only eight years old. She went through Cao Ang's death with him, watched him meet and fall in love with Zhen Mi, saw how his learning rivaled Cao Zhi's, and knew how desperately he wanted power and his father's approval.
She grew up alongside him, like his shadow. She was him.
And it took Liu Qiaoruo half her life to understand that Cao Pi didn't love Zhen Mi or Guo Nuwang. He only loved himself.
He was an extraordinary talent for kingship, and also a thoroughgoing egotist. Could affection coexist with coldheartedness? Could kindness coexist with cruelty?
Liu Qiaoruo had never expected to weigh as heavily on his heart as Mount Tai. But as her soul scattered, she saw him weeping like a child.
"I should have stayed by your side for your whole life, but I truly couldn't bear to see the rest of it. Forgive me for being too cowardly. I can only stay with you this far."
Liu Qiaoruo's confession:
I know his life will end when he turns forty. I can't bear to watch any longer, so I'd rather this game I called "saving him" end in failure. I can't help wondering what I came here to save him from. Within the bounds of what could be controlled, he was already living freely, exactly as he pleased.
I have never met a fool whose emotions showed so plainly. After he was named Crown Prince, he got so excited that he instinctively tried to hug me, only to embrace empty air. The fool loves grapes, too. I often watch him and think, You should eat fewer. Aren't you worried they'll make your teeth ache?
Cao Ziheng, how I wish you could have lived long enough for grapes to make your teeth ache.
Theme: What we call salvation is a form of self-redemption
