(The Watch Dogs System pays tribute to and is partly inspired by Ubisoft’s Watch Dogs 2.)
As the son of a top football agent, Kirill Mund’s childhood was spent doing things like:
Learning to act cool like his dad and helping Ronaldo deal with model-related gossip, following Neymar around to play football in the mud...
And arguing passionately in his head with a “Watch Dogs System” that had gotten the time, place, and person wrong.
No one understood why the kid barely spoke, but everyone thought Kirill would become another top agent. Instead, he put on a pair of goalkeeper gloves and took his place in front of the white goal line.
From 2005 to 2022, he witnessed the Galacticos rise again and the German Machine reach its peak. He was the goalkeeping king feared most by opponents, and the little moon doted on by the Bernabeu.
Also known as: How Many Good Big Brothers Do You Have, Anyway?
Aside from being great at football and handsome, Kirill knew full well that his social skills were basically debuffed to the max.
Because he had to communicate with the System in his head, he often failed to notice what the living, breathing people around him were saying.
His head was always full of football. When he wasn’t playing, he was holed up at home, obsessively playing FM and FIFA.
His blood came from two famously cold-faced nations, Russia and Germany. When he didn’t smile, it looked like he was giving people the cold shoulder.
Add that platinum-blond spiky hair, those seemingly cold blue eyes, and the aura of someone who’d resort to physical violence in a heartbeat...
Yikes! He looked like an arrogant, unruly guy who thought the world of himself.
Coaches and unfamiliar teammates: Why does this guy always look like he’s picking a fight...?
Kirill: Bruh, I really don’t get how other people with Systems manage to communicate inside and outside their heads at the same time! Guys, I just can’t do it!
To keep the peace in the locker room and prevent the team from falling apart, Kirill decided that wherever he went, he would latch onto an easygoing big brother and let that person look after him from then on.
Neymar: Hey, bro, we said we’d play together. Why are you always stopping me on the other team?
Kaka: Stop zoning out when the coach is talking. You need to listen.
Cristiano Ronaldo: If you can’t save my shots, don’t ever say you know me again... And if you do save them, don’t say you know me either!
James Rodriguez: We barely interact on the pitch, but I’m still declaring that the classic playmaker and classic goalkeeper are made for each other.
Luka Modric: Pass me the ball. I’ll take care of the rest.
Manuel Neuer: Stop standing still in the six-yard box. You can be more adventurous with your positioning, like running all the way up to midfield.
Meanwhile, all the way over in Brazil, Ronaldo was still worrying himself sick over his godson’s love life. The kid was always so stern and quiet. Would he end up like his dad and have someone barge into his home and sweep him off his feet?
By the time he realized what was happening, all sorts of good big brothers had gathered around Kirill. Ronaldo’s eyes widened in shock, and he could think of only one thing:
“Your Majesty! Your godson is gay!!”
[Before You Read]
· A Russian-German mixed-race, Doberman-like little goalkeeper with (pseudo) social anxiety
· A lighthearted, feel-good, everyone’s-favorite leveling-up story. He goes on short-term loans, but spends most of his time at Real Madrid.
· I have tremendous respect for the other goalkeepers from overlapping eras, and I’ll do my best to handle the story well.
· There’s no way I could leave out the romance. I love romance so much!!
(Enjoy the amazing draft I commissioned and colored by hand! It’s so gorgeous, so gorgeous. I commissioned one for the other team too!!)
Theme: Finding your purpose amid life’s unexpected turns
