Who Uses Their Marriage Certificate as an Apprenticeship Token?

[Two Male Leads + 1v1 + Past and Present Lives]

[The Cool, Restrained Uke from a Thousand Years Ago x The Obsessive, Unhinged Seme]

[A Thousand Years Later: A Shady, Money-Obsessed, Hair-Trigger Uke x The Still-Obsessive, Unhinged, Green-Tea Seme]

On the first day of school, he'd barely taken a few steps onto campus when a man who looked about his age called him Mom.

Yan Yishu stayed calm, raised a hand, and gave him a smack. Then he said, exasperated, "If you're desperate for love and a mom, make a post on your phone. Netizens everywhere will be fighting to become your mom. You'll have the most moms in the world."

Yan Yishu could only wonder if the guy had just come out of a psychiatric hospital.

The next day, just as he was heading out after school to get a meal, a man in a white suit came up to him. He held a string of Buddhist prayer beads, and his shaved head was as shiny as a braised egg. If his features hadn't been handsome, that egg-shaped head would've been impossible to pull off.

The man immediately said, "I'm your husband from a thousand years ago... I..."

"I don't believe in Buddhism, Taoism, or Jesus. I believe in light." Yan Yishu struck a pose from Ultraman Galaxy, cutting him off with an exasperated look.

When Yan Yishu got home, he complained to his friends about what had happened over the past couple of days.

Am I having a run of bad luck?

Why have I run into either a lunatic or a con artist every day for the past three days?

What for?

Tell me, is someone setting me up?

Yan Yishu beat both of them up, then left feeling thoroughly satisfied.

But later, the guy who'd called him Mom became his college classmate. Every morning, he helpfully brought Yan Yishu breakfast. Whenever a man came near him, he immediately shoved him away. Whenever someone gave him a love letter, he snatched it and tore it to shreds.

And the con artist became his advisor.

He ate with Yan Yishu, went shopping with him, and got in the way of his dates.

Under the constant care of the lunatic and the con artist, Yan Yishu really did break down and go berserk!

He punched both of them hard again and declared, "If you two pull this crap on me again, I swear I'll turn you into roast ducks."

Shang Bu: "I don't believe you."

His son: "I don't believe you."

The lunatic and the con artist said the words in unison.

Yan Yishu nearly broke down. He was completely out of ideas. And it was true: he couldn't do it. He burst into tears, and the two immediately scrambled to wipe them away and comfort him.

Shang Bu: "Don't cry, darling."

His son: "Mom, don't cry. I'll beat up that old geezer for you."

Theme: I can make you become whatever I want you to be.