A foolish, vacant-looking refugee recently arrived in Li Family Village. The village chief said that the village's guardian had just drowned, so it would be a good omen to find a replacement. He found a thatched hut and let the newcomer stay. "You can live here from now on. Don't cause trouble or commit crimes. If you behave yourself, the village won't let you starve to death."
New Village Guardian, Xia Yanzhou: I can't understand a word this old man is babbling about.
After transmigrating here, Xia Yanzhou discovered that he couldn't speak the same language as these ancient people. Through gestures and silly grins, he barely managed to get by in Li Family Village.
Every day, he looked forward most to nightfall. When he closed his eyes, short videos from the modern world would play automatically in his mind. Their lively comment sections became his only social life. He posted lots of comments saying he had transmigrated and needed help, but netizens thought he was just being absurd.
He was so done with everything.
After a mistaken click, he registered himself as a seller on an online marketplace. Looking at his empty thatched hut, he listed his one chipped bowl for a hundred yuan. Handmade with ancient techniques. Sure, it was chipped, but it was an ancient chipped bowl! An antique!
Netizens mocked him: "You dare charge a hundred for this junk?"
The marketplace detected an unfriendly comment, and customer service stepped in: "We're sorry you had a bad shopping experience, dear. How about a ten percent discount on this item?"
So it turned out that junk was junk, no matter the era.
Fortunately, even junk could earn him a little money. With the ten yuan from the marketplace sale, he bought a five-jin bag of rice. Eating a small handful each day, he managed not to starve to death.
From then on, he made a career of scavenging, listing whatever he could find.
Some time later, he got into an argument with the platform's customer service. "What do you mean, living people can't be listed for sale? Look at this excellent male-model physique! If you won't let me sell him, I can rent him out!"
Customer service: "Dear, this platform does not allow human trafficking~"
After losing the argument, Xia Yanzhou looked at the tall man on the ground and sighed, preparing to drag him back to the river. Who knew the man would suddenly open his eyes and ask the three great questions of human philosophy?
Who am I? Who are you? Where is this?
**
Silly gong x sharp-witted shou
Theme: Live well
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