The Little Widow's Husband Is Dead

My husband used to beat me. I poisoned him and ran away, only to be dragged into the Eternal Bliss Cult by someone with ulterior motives. After that, I ended up having to choose between two ghosts to be my husband.

I could also choose neither, make a clean getaway, survive the Great Depression, become the next Buffett, then buy myself a little island and lounge in the sun beside a huge villa and swimming pool...

What good is a husband who can't even see the sun!

-

The moment I was brought into the Eternal Bliss Cult, I met their impossibly handsome, divinely majestic cult leader.

He came right up and tried to hug me, saying, "You must have gone through something painful."

I was under his roof and had to bow to him, so I put up with it.

Actually, being hugged felt wonderful...

The cult leader was very tall, holding me completely in his arms, as though looking down at me with a kind of "compassion"...

I realized he was listening to me.

"My husband died..." I said, my expression dazed.

The cult leader wept over my plight, then gently told me, "Your husband died? That's great! He picked a pretty good time to go."

Me: "?"

That night, something broke into my room: a handsome, extremely sexy man in disheveled clothes, his entire body covered in dark blue, stripe-like tattoos.

The evil spirit stared straight at me and casually licked his lips. "You think you can poison your husband, run away, and be done with it? His family found out and they're furious. So why were you able to make it all the way here without a problem? Take a guess."

He curled his lips into a smile.

Me: "?"

Who is this guy?

-

The evil spirit said, "You poisoned your husband the same way. A contest of strength should be fair and honorable. Poison is a despicable method used only by the weak."

I couldn't care less. "I'm not weak. I'm a great person, wise and brave, who beats the strong despite being weak! It's other people who are despicable when they hurt me. Do you know how he used to beat me? Has anyone ever hurt you like that? Do you know how I managed not to hate myself even while I was being hurt? Do you know how much it hurts? I've always been in pain! It's fine if no one comforts me. I've never expected to be rescued or comforted. People can only save themselves... I saved myself. And you just stand there, lightly judging me for looking ugly while I do it. Fine, then I'm ugly. I'm already invincibly strong this way."

His expression grew complicated. "I know. Me too. I'm not an idiot."

I thought, You are.

You all are.

-

You say murderers go to hell.

Why should they?

My father sold me, my mother hated me, my husband beat me, and my friends bullied me. I merely fought back, and the scumbags went to heaven while I went to hell?

Ridiculous.

I refuse to accept it.

I'll stay alive and be happier than anyone in heaven.

-

A major crisis... I wanted the little widow to have them both, but apparently that's not allowed, so I can only pick one. Which one?!

Maybe I should just reject both and get out of here!

Theme: I will keep going strong in the face of life's difficulties.