[No CP]
When Cijue first arrived in the cultivation world, he got tangled up with a Pinduoduo System.
System: [User, you need to get five cultivators to help you slash the price before you can claim an advanced Foundation Establishment Pill.]
Heh, whose “slash the price” deal only uses one account?
Cijue scrolled through his list of secret identities: Prosperity and Good Fortune, Your Strong Daddy Is Here, Serenity and Ambition, Geese Flying South...
Human Emperor Prosperity and Good Fortune silently took out a storage bag full of advanced pills. “Elder brother, would you like to play at being the Imperial Preceptor? ☺️”
Demon Venerable Your Strong Daddy Is Here slammed an axe into the System. “So you're the one who's been pestering my nephew and brainwashing him every day? 👿”
Buddhist Son Serenity and Ambition chanted a prayer and tossed out a golden alms bowl. “Little uncle, it would be best to cleanse this evil creature as soon as possible. 😠”
Demon King Geese Flying South crushed the System in his claws. “Cijue brought big brother another present? 😘”
System: “Aaaah!!!”
The System failed to bind itself to a native of the cultivation world. After being slashed so many times, it became a high-level defensive immortal artifact.
Cijue dragged the System around, picking fights with everyone. “The more you hit me, the higher my grade gets. If we're family, come give me a whack!”
The System broke down.
With the last of its strength, it sent Cijue to the Immortal Emperor. The Immortal Emperor had been its previous Host, so he ought to protect the cultivation world... right?
The Immortal Emperor sat high above them, his gaze passing over the System before finally settling on Cijue.
The System, full of old data and smugly certain of its victory, said: [Just wait for your death!]
But then Cijue stepped forward and waved.
“Hi, Mommy! Long time no see! I was in such a hurry to get here that I forgot to set the rice cooker timer...”
System: [Huh?]
System: [Aaaah!!!]
System: [You're the Immortal Emperor, why are you hitting me? Hit him!!!]
*
1. Every secret identity is Cijue himself.
2. The male protagonist has no romantic storyline with any other character. More details to come.
3. No unsolicited writing advice or subjective changes to the wording, please. Internet memes are not meant to discriminate against anyone, so don't read too much into them.
Recommending a coming-soon novel.
After Setting Up a Street Stall, I Ruled the Entire Galaxy, an indulgent sci-fi novel. Please add it to your reading list!
Synopsis: [Unfantasized]
This was an age when nobody could restrain their appetite.
People were divided into ordinary people, warriors, and saints. Recipes had been lost, and only saints could make delicious food, which they used to soothe warriors' mental powers.
Luma stared in disbelief at a pitch-black, unidentifiable lump.
“That's what you call delicious food?”
The white-robed saint sneered. “How dare you! I bet you don't even know how to wash vegetables!”
Luma: “...”
What a joke! He made his living running a street stall!
Luma heated oil in a wok and put on a show of the Wok Prince's signature skills: oil sizzling in the pan, spatula flying, the aroma bursting forth!
The passing army of warriors: “!!!”
Luma saved an army on the verge of going berserk and dying. Grown men fell to their knees and wept, while Luma simply waved them away.
“Keep it low-key, keep it low-key.”
Before long, four woks had appeared by the roadside, a long line had formed in front of the stall, and the Alliance's top brass arrived, armed to the teeth. They took one look at the line and saw nothing but familiar faces.
“Secretary-General, Colonel... why is even the Marshal here?”
“Didn't you say you looked down on low-ranking saints?!”
Luma bustled away behind his mask. “Take it easy, take it easy. There's enough for everyone!”
Enough! For! Everyone!
The people of the galaxy wept: “It's been so long since we've had a saint this pure 😭😭😭”
Luma, his hands covered in oil: “???”
Theme: There's no one better than Mom!
It's gone. Unfortunately, I forgot about this book. It's been on the shelf for a long time, and it's gone. 😭
It's pretty good-looking, but it didn't actually penetrate me, so it was a waste of time for me to have sex.
The first time I feel the vest, 🐰, I'm looking forward to the next chapter!
It's good to watch and the plot is great 🐰 Looking forward to the next chapter
Hahahahaha, after all, it was Tongzi who took all the 🐶
I have to say that Ji Lan is also quite cute 🤩
Meimei ate my wife's latest article, so happy! Thank you for your hard work, ma'am! ! ! Happy Dragon Boat Festival! ! ! [Spread flowers][sprinkle flowers][sprinkle flowers]
Strawberry Candy to Accompany You to Sleep
Set up a Roadside Stall and Rule the Interstellar
Eighty-Year-Old Handsome Man and His Young Wife Fight in Xiangjiang at Night
The Coal Boss's Son-In-Law
Emperor Bai Yueguang's Master Is Always Taken Away by Force [Darcissus]
The Heartthrob Beta's Guide to Abusing Scumbags
The Real Young Master Is a Cotton Worker
My Fiancé Became a Family of Three
After a Plushie Lover Was Stranded on a Beast Planet
An Office Drone and His Househusband Puppy
It's a typo. It's not the Ancient Beast Master.
It's gone. Unfortunately, I forgot about this book. It's been on the shelf for a long time, and it's gone. 😭
It's pretty good-looking, but it didn't actually penetrate me, so it was a waste of time for me to have sex.
The first time I feel the vest, 🐰, I'm looking forward to the next chapter!
It's good to watch and the plot is great 🐰 Looking forward to the next chapter
Hahahahaha, after all, it was Tongzi who took all the 🐶
I have to say that Ji Lan is also quite cute 🤩
Meimei ate my wife's latest article, so happy! Thank you for your hard work, ma'am! ! ! Happy Dragon Boat Festival! ! ! [Spread flowers][sprinkle flowers][sprinkle flowers]