I Went Down the Mountain at Three, and My Dad Is the Alliance's Most Wanted Criminal

I was raised on a garbage planet by a group of synthetic beasts. When I was three, a man with a mech arm thicker than my thigh rescued me.

He said he was my dad.

My dad is a good man, just a little busy. Every day, he's dodging the Pan-Galactic Alliance's pursuit.

[Beep. Target "Cataclysm" detected. Bounty: 900 billion star coins. Capture alive preferred.]

I hugged Dad's mech leg and said, [Dad, they say you're worth a lot.]

Dad picked me up and blasted open the Alliance's encirclement. "Come on, I'll take you to buy a new dress."

On the run, I met lots of "uncles."

The galaxy's top intelligence broker, known as "Faceless," hacked the Alliance's financial system just to buy me a limited-edition lollipop.

The gene-pirate leader who ruled the dark star regions turned an enemy fleet into a pretzel just to make me laugh.

They all say my dad is the demon who destroyed the old world.

But all I know is that he braids my hair and saves the tastiest food in the galaxy for me.