After Binding to a Dirty-Talk System, My Mortal Enemy Keeps Wanting a Kiss

[Two male leads] [Cultivation] [Funny and lighthearted] [System] [Two powerful leads] [Prepare for them to fall hard]

Sharp-tongued, unhinged Demon Venerable × Pure-hearted, easily flustered sword cultivator

No one-sided pining: if there’s a problem, kiss it out.

Better to make a scene in public than torment each other.

Live for a minute, show off for all sixty seconds.

Xie Ci and Gu Hanyuan fought for three hundred years. Neither of them ever imagined that the one to shove them into the same marital bed would be a broken System calling itself “Grandmaster Matchmaker.”

The System said, “You two are destined partners. If your affection score doesn’t meet the minimum, your cultivation will drop.”

Xie Ci: “I’m the mighty Demon Venerable. You expect me to gaze lovingly into my archenemy’s eyes?”

System: “Then your cultivation drops.”

Gu Hanyuan drew his sword. “I’ll cut it down.”

System: “Cut me, and both of you lose cultivation.”

Xie Ci threw an arm around Gu Hanyuan’s shoulders and grinned at the System. “Fine. It’s just an act, right? I may not be good for much, but I’ve got plenty of dirty lines.”

Gu Hanyuan’s ears turned scarlet. He gritted his teeth and muttered, “Just you wait. I’ll cut you down one of these days!”

After that, the System issued a series of tasks:

“Walk hand in hand down the main street of the marketplace.”

“Spend the whole night in the same bed.”

“Call each other ‘baby’ in public and feed each other.”

The entire cultivation world went mad.

Xie Ci: “We’re acting, so our cultivation won’t drop.”

Gu Hanyuan: “Yeah. Acting.”

System: “Affection score +999.”

Xie Ci: “?”

Gu Hanyuan: “?”

System: “Detected partners caring for each other. Affection score +888. Wishing you both a speedy family expansion.”

Xie Ci: “We’re both men!!!”

System: “Love can overcome every obstacle. Wishing you two a long and happy life, with a litter of eight babies ❤️❤️❤️”