What do you do when you transmigrate as a real heiress who’s been replaced in her own home and cyberbullied by the entire internet? Zong Lai, a max-level master of the occult, kicks the door open: “I’m done pretending. I’m going berserk and taking everyone down!” She smacks century-old ghosts over the head with a frying pan, uses half a cup of leftover milk tea to draw talismans and control the whole scene, and practices cultivation with a thoroughly materialist approach: exorcising spirits by physical force!
The fake heiress plays the innocent white lotus and sets her up? Zong Lai pulls out a makeup mirror from a two-yuan shop. “Monster, show your true form! Look, your red floral thermal underwear is showing!” Her biased scumbag brother goes bankrupt and drops to his knees, begging forgiveness? Zong Lai flashes a payment code. “The agreement cutting ties is already in effect. The balance for breaking the formation is one hundred million. Miss a cent, and I’ll personally scatter your ashes!”
To earn enough to build a pure-gold Taoist temple, Zong Lai slings a red-and-blue woven plastic bag over her shoulder, slurps up river-snail rice noodles, and takes the entertainment industry by storm. A century-old water ghost grabs her by the throat on a supernatural reality show? She pulls a copy of Five Years of College Entrance Exams and Three Years of Mock Exams out of her sack and slaps it against the ghost’s face. “Didn’t get into college when you were alive? You can’t leave until you finish this test!” The internet’s haters have their worldview shattered and drop to their knees on the spot. “Master, save us! We’ll buy every one of your protective talismans for a hundred thousand yuan each!”
Meanwhile, Zhuo Jingxiao, the Beijing powerbroker nicknamed the “Living King of Hell,” is rumored to be cruel and vicious, with anyone who touches him meeting an instant death. Right now, Zong Lai has him pinned to the sofa, sucking out his baleful energy like she’s cupping him. Zong Lai burps. “Boss, this top-grade baleful energy is as good as 1982 Lafite. I’ve got my eye on you as my human-shaped power bank!” The Living King of Hell, his ears red, hands her an unlimited black card. “The money is yours, my life is yours. Tonight… do you want to stay over?”
[Unhinged comedy + high-stakes occult arts + real and fake heiresses + everyone regrets it, but no one gets forgiven! We recommend keeping some fast-acting heart medicine handy while reading~]
