[The most miserable lovesick puppy in the Northeast + the most useless immortal crew in history = hilarious, heaven-defying chaos!]
My name is Su Xiaoqiang. I'm a courier in Tieling, I make 2,800 yuan a month, and I've been single for twenty-five years.
I thought I was just plain unlucky, until I overheard two underworld bailiffs chatting in a hospital bathroom.
“That kid has the Heaven-Cursed Lovesick Puppy fate. Anyone who's kind to him is doomed. Heaven itself certified it!”
“His grandma has only seven days left. Once he breaks down and signs the Heaven-Abandoned Pact, we'll have completed our mission.”
Me: ??? Heaven's been psychologically manipulating me for twenty-five years?!
To save Grandma, I was forced to set up an altar and summon the immortals by making an inverted wish...
What showed up was a wolf whose howls always went off-key, a bear that only ate and took a beating, a mosquito that got diarrhea every time it sucked up bad luck, and a cockroach that wouldn't die no matter how many times you stepped on it.
This is it? This is really it!
But Heaven sends people to bring calamities down on me every day. I have no choice but to take them on.
Later, I discover that the unluckier I get, the stronger I become. The harder Heaven tries to kill me, the more benefits I wring out of it.
Grandma says, “Heaven isn't a god. It's a set of rules. People made the rules, so people can change them.”
Fine. I'll show you how it's done.
With this bunch of unwanted, useless immortals at my side, I'll make that damn Heaven understand:
Even lovesick puppies get their day in the sun, and even good-for-nothings can defy the heavens!
