Chen Xuanzang wakes up to find himself Tang Sanzang in the world of Journey to the West, bound to the “Strongest Anti-Convention System.” Facing the inevitable eighty-one tribulations and the schemes of the gods and Buddhas above, he grins. “Whoever wants to fetch the scriptures can go do it themselves.”
To the female demons: “Take refuge in Buddhism? Sure. Come sit in my arms first, and we’ll have a heart-to-heart.” From Bai Jingjing, the stunning “Half-Body Guanyin,” a rat spirit from Mount Ling, to the peerlessly aloof fairy of the Moon Palace, he wins them over and trains them along the way. The pilgrimage becomes his ultimate beauty pageant.
· To the male demons: “Join me, and you’ll have all the food and drink you want and roam the Three Realms at will.” He recruits the strong ones, like the Black Bear Spirit and the Yellow Wind Monster, as his vanguard, and the clever ones, whose identities will soon be revealed, as his strategists. The journey west becomes one enormous recruitment drive.
· To the gods and Buddhas across the heavens: “Nezha, your Wind Fire Wheels are fast. Want to be my messenger?” “True Lord Erlang, your third eye is perfect for reconnaissance. A monthly salary of a hundred thousand incense offerings. How about it?” The immortals who once went after him are all becoming executives in his future army of rebellion against Heaven.
Ultimate goal:
When Chen Xuanzang arrives at Mount Ling with a million demons, a hundred thousand divine generals, and three thousand concubines, the Tathagata asks gravely, “Golden Cicada, you’ve finally come to fetch the scriptures?”
Chen Xuanzang picks his ear and flicks away a bit of “immortal pill” (actually dead skin he’s just rubbed off), then says nonchalantly:
“Fetch the scriptures? No. I’m here to take the heads off your shoulders. From today on, Mount Ling and the Celestial Court both bear the surname Chen.”
