The Traveler Across Worlds

Generally. Why are there so many adjective prefixes? Did you use AI to expand it? When a character appears, you can use half a page to describe his appearance... A lot of the descriptions feel useless. And why do you like to use narration so much? You can count the number of times you have used it in dozens of chapters. A character appeared for half a page and wrote about his appearance, then another one or two pages about how we met before, and then it was over with another chapter. No wonder another comment said that there was too much narration before the trip. I didn't think much when I looked at the catalog. After reading it, I realized that these can be divided into three chapters, one about the background of the world, one about getting the diploma, and one about celebrating. There are too many useless things, which makes me tired and scattered.

The writing is not bad, but there is too much narration in the front, and it has been a long time since I left the world, so it is difficult to retain people. Come on ヽ(*ﾟｰﾟ*)ﾉ